


Surrender

by thefangirlingdead



Category: Glee
Genre: ALSO a little bit of Supernatural crossover at the end, Anal Sex, Incest, M/M, Sibling Incest, Violence, cooper basically sells his soul for blaine, crossroad demon - Freeform, there only a tiny bit of klaine, whoops
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-03
Updated: 2013-01-25
Packaged: 2017-11-20 05:38:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 9
Words: 29,351
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/581884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thefangirlingdead/pseuds/thefangirlingdead
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Blaine is fifteen and Cooper is barely twenty-one, Cooper makes a decision that will ultimately cost him his life. When Blaine is left in the hospital after the Sadie Hawkins dance, Cooper can’t help but feel like it’s partially his fault, and would do anything to right things. Including selling his soul to save his little brother.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Deal I'm Making

**Author's Note:**

> _And it's so hard to say it, but I've been here before_  
>  And I'll surrender up my heart  
> And swap it for yours

When Blaine is fifteen and Cooper is barely twenty-one, Cooper makes a decision that will ultimately cost him his life.

Blaine begs him for weeks to chaperone the dance. He begs him, because Cooper is the only one (besides some of Blaine's friends from school) who knows he is gay, and the younger Anderson had planned on taking a boy to the Sadie Hawkins dance. What makes Blaine even more excited is that the boy had asked him, not the other way around. It seemed like things were finally falling into place for him, and the last thing he needed was for some jerk to screw it up for him. So he begs Cooper to chaperone the dance, but as much as the older Anderson wants to, he declines.

It just so happens that Cooper has an audition for a television show in California that same weekend, and it is his big break. And though Blaine is disappointed, he understands. So before Cooper leaves, he gives his little brother a pep talk about not letting other people push him around. Even that Thursday afternoon before he leaves, Cooper takes Blaine into the back yard and teaches him some simple fighting techniques, just in case. (Though he assures Blaine that as long as he doesn't wander off alone, he won't have to use them.)

So with a heavy heart, because he really does want to be there to protect his baby brother, Cooper heads off to California early Friday morning.

Saturday night, he receives the worst call of his life.

He's sitting alone in his hotel room around ten or so, going over his audition from earlier that day in his head when his phone rings. He glances at the caller ID and when he sees that it's his mother and he wonders for a second why she would be calling so late before he answers. "If you're wondering how I did, let's just say that the part is as good as mine," Cooper half jokes into the phone instead of saying a normal  _hello_.

" _Cooper_ ," His mom's voice wavers as she speaks his name and he immediately sits up.

Something isn't right.

"Mom?" He asks, "Is everything okay?"

"I…" She starts, her voice cracking. There's a long pause, and it feels like the longest pause of his life before she finishes with, "No."

"What happened?" He rushes out, his thoughts immediately going to Blaine – his baby brother that he loves dearly and should have been protecting. He shakes the thought from his head though because  _there's no way that Blaine could be hurt. Those kinds of things don't happen to people like you. He's okay._

"It's Blaine," She breaths, confirming his fears, though, and he immediately feels his heart sink. He feels like dying. In fact, he wishes he were dead. Anything would be better than listening to his mom explain to him that something happened at the dance. Before she even has a chance to tell him  _what_  exactly happened, he's muttering out  _I'm_ _on my way_  and throwing his clothes carelessly into his suitcase and is out the door.

As if things couldn't get worse, the sight at the hospital is  _terrible._

When Cooper walks through the  _emergency_  doors only a few hours later, he spots his family almost instantly. His mother and father are sitting on the far side of the room, and his mom is a  _wreck_. She's slumped into his father's lap, and Cooper is sure that she was crying before and is now spent. Her body is still, he face hidden, but his father is still stroking her hair softly. And his  _father_. The second Cooper realizes how bad it  _really_  is, is when he sees his father's face. His eyes are red from crying, his hair disheveled and Cooper realizes that he's  _never_  seen his father cry. Not once.

There's a couple other family members scattered around the waiting room – grandparents and aunts and uncles – but Cooper goes straight to his father. "Is he…" Cooper starts, trying not to say  _okay_  cause it's apparent that he's not.

"Just got out of surgery a bit ago," His father replies softly, "They had to stop some internal bleeding and remove his spleen…"

"Jesus…" Cooper breaths, "But he's going to be okay… Right?"

"I… I don't know, Cooper," His father returns, "We'll just have to wait." Cooper frantically shakes his head no in response, and starts heading toward the nearest doors to where he hopes Blaine is. "Cooper, wait!" His father calls, standing and waking his mother.

"No," Cooper breaths, "I need to see him." And despite the nurse trying to stop him, he pushes the doors open and heads down the hallway, searching each room's window frantically for a sign of his brother. He ignores the nurses and doctors trying to stop him, ignores the many  _sir, please stop, you can't be in here_ 's that he gets, and keeps walking. He keeps walking until he sees a curly headed boy in a nearby room, looking bloody and beaten. If he had it his way, he would burst in the door, but he is stopped by his father's arms around his waist.

"Stop!" His dad bellows, "Stop it, Cooper!"

"I need to see him," Cooper just repeats mindlessly, tears now streaming down his face, and struggles hopelessly under his father's grasp.

"Stop, please," The older man begs, and after another minute of struggling, Cooper numbly gives up. With one last glace at the room, he allows his father and a nurse to escort him back to the lobby.

...

It's a few days later, when Cooper finally asks the question that everyone has been dying to ask, but hasn't been brave enough to say.

"When is he going to wake up?" Cooper's words pierce the silence as the doctor finishes explaining Blaine's progress to them. While progress is great and all, and Cooper is glad that the surgery went fine and there were no complications, Blaine has been unconscious for almost three days. All Cooper wants is to be able to talk to his brother again – to be able to hug him and kiss him and tell him he's sorry that he wasn't there.

"Well…" The doctor starts, glancing over the curious eyes that fill the waiting room. He clears his throat, "It's difficult to tell in cases like your brother's. With head trauma like he has, it could be a matter of hours, or weeks or…"

_Never_ , Cooper finishes the thought when he trails off.

"He's lucky to be alive," The doctor continues, trying to lighten the mood. It doesn't help.

_Blaine isn't alive. He's a vegetable._

At that, Cooper stands and leaves the room in favor of going outside. He feels like he's going to be sick.

...

After another two weeks, he basically gives up. He gets a call back from California, letting him know that he got the part that he auditioned for, but he never returns it. He doesn't care. All he wants is for Blaine to get better.

He mopes around the house while his family isn't at the hospital, spending most of his time in Blaine's room. He sits on his bed at night after his parents have gone to sleep and tries not to think of what would have happened had he not bailed on the dance.

Things change one Friday night, though.

Cooper is at the bar – some shitty tiny place on the outskirts of town – sitting alone like he usually does, and staring at his half drank beer, trying his hardest not to think about Blaine.

"You look down," A woman's voice purrs in his ear.

He turns slightly to find himself staring at a beautiful young woman with long, dark hair. She's got a slight smirk on her face and striking hazel eyes, and as Cooper's eyes travel down her body, he quickly notices how she practically oozes with confidence. He tears his eyes away from her, though, and continues staring at his unfinished beer, hoping she'll leave him alone. The last thing he needs is some girl trying to hit on him. He needs  _Blaine_.

" _Wow_ ," The girl says in mock surprise, "Cranky."

Cooper doesn't apologize, instead just shakes his head, and she takes that as a cue to keep talking.

"You know, a  _gentleman_  would ask me to join him," She says a little sharply, "Or at least buy me a drink…"

"I guess I'm not a gentleman, then," Cooper shoots back, somewhat frustrated. It's out of character for him to be so rude, but he can't help it. Not tonight.

She takes it as an invitation to sit, for some reason, and gets cozy next to Cooper, ordering a drink for herself. " _Cooper Anderson,"_  She says softly swirling her finger around the rim of her glass and causing his head to practically spin around in her direction. She smirks, "Oh, you think I didn't know who you were? Give me a little credit. I've heard a  _lot_ about you, Cooper." At that, Cooper  _swears_ that he sees her eyes flash red, but when he blinks, it's gone.

_You're going crazy_.

"How do you know me?" He asks, suddenly frightened – though he shouldn't be – by the girl next to him, "Who  _are_  you?"

"Who I am isn't important," She shoots back, smiling slightly.

"Then what do you want from me?" He asks, "I'm not really in the mood for this shit."

"Oh yeah… I forgot. Baby brother's still on the verge of dying, right?" Her words are like venom.

If she weren't a girl, Cooper would have her slammed up against the wall by now. Instead, his knuckles are turning white with the way that he's gripping the bar he stares at her and hisses, "Don't you  _dare_  bring up my brother."

She sighs, as if she's getting bored with the conversation, "Look, it's not what  _I_  want from  _you_ … it's what you want from me, Cooper."

"What?" He asks, confused as to how she had managed to turn the conversation around on him.

She shrugs, "I can help you."

"Bullshit," He immediately shoots back, still glaring at her.

"Whatever," She replies coolly, "Don't say I didn't try." And at that, she's standing and walking away from the bar, drink unfinished and unpaid for. Cooper sits in her wake, head still reeling from what just happened.

_Who the fuck was that girl?_

Though part of him wants to follow her just to yell at her and tell her to shut the fuck up, another half of him wants to know what she meant when she said  _I can help you_. He's not sure what part of him it is that makes him stand only a minute after she walks out the door, throw some cash on the bar, and make his way outside after her.

When he throws the front door of the bar open, though, he can't help the sudden feeling of disappointment that washes over him when there is nobody in the parking lot. Though he wasn't sure what he was going to say to her, he wanted to find that girl. Some unknown part of him felt like it needed to talk to her.

"Hey handsome."

Cooper spins on his heel at the voice to find the girl, smirk still spread across her face, leaning on the side of the building.

_Weird. Nobody was there a second ago_.

"Just couldn't resist me, could you?" She asks, taking a step forward.

"I don't-" Cooper stutters as she makes her way toward him, trying to find the right words to say, "What did you mean back there? When you said you could help me?"

" _God, you people are always so desperate,_ " She mutters under her breath, then smiles at him, as if she hadn't just said it, "What if I told you that you could have whatever you want? That I could give it to you?"

Cooper lets out a small nervous laugh, "I'd call you crazy."

And at that, the girl blinks, and when her eyes open, they're the same red that Cooper had seen in the bar. Only it doesn't go away this time. It stays. It not a trick of the neon lights of the bar – her eyes are red. "Would you?" She asks, still smirking slightly as she struts up to Cooper, closing the large gap between them.

"Who – what are you?" Cooper stutters, taking a step backward, suddenly terrified.

She shrugs, "Just someone who wants to help."

"Bull," Cooper calls, taking another step back, "What do you want?"

She sighs at that, blinking her eyes and letting them go back to the pretty hazel that they were before. "Nothing gets by you, does it, Cooper?" He straightens his posture and trying to act tough, even though he's kind of freaking out a little on the inside because he's either going crazy from lack of sleep or this girl's eyes just turned red like something out of a horror movie. "Well you're  _not_  going crazy," She says, reading his mind, "And I  _guess_  you're onto something with the whole horror movie idea…"

"You… you can…" Cooper trails off because now he  _really_ thinks he's going crazy.

"Read your mind? Sure," She grins, "It's just a little perk that comes along with the whole demon thing."

" _Demon_ ," Cooper repeats, "Great, I really am going insane."

"Far from it," She counters, taking a couple of steps forward and closing the gap between them again, "Normally I don't tell you guys about the whole  _demon_  part… I just wait for you to get drunk enough to believe me when I say I can give you anything you want. But  _you_ , you're different. You're a smart cookie, Cooper. Besides, I can't say no to that pretty face."

"Demon," He repeats again, "And you want to  _help_ me?"

"Nothing gets past you," She teases, smiling still, "Yes, I want to help you. After all, you want your baby brother back, right?"

" _I told you not to mention Blaine_ ," Cooper says through gritted teeth, her words hitting a soft spot again.

"Why not? He's all that's been on your mind all night.  _When will Blaine get better? What if Blaine doesn't make it? I let Blaine down,"_ She mocks him, "Feeling a little guilty about something?"

"Shut the fuck up," He hisses, "You don't know anything about me. Or my brother."

Then the girl laughs – she actually fucking laughs, and continues circling Cooper, "Oh but that's where you're wrong, Cooper. I know  _everything_  about you and your brother. How you left him all alone to get beaten by those kids. How you feel guilty because you were supposed to be there…" Then she stops, smiling for a moment before continuing, "How you were actually  _jealous_ of the boy he took to the dance. How you're hopelessly in  _love_  with your brother and you're terrified that you'll never get to tell him-"

She's cut off by Cooper taking an unexpected step forward and gripping the collar of her leather coat in his hand, " _Shut the fuck up_."

"Oh you didn't think I knew that part?" She just shoots back, despite his menacing look, "Like I said,  _I know everything_."

At that, Cooper lets go, his body going numb with her words. "What do you want from me?"

"I already told you," She replies, brushing herself off, "I want to help you. I can get Blaine back for you. Give him back to you."

"And why would you do that?" Cooper asks, skeptical.

"I could give a shit less if you're fucking your brother," She teases, "I mean,  _hello_ , look at  _me_. I just simply want to help."

Cooper eyes her warily, trying to see through her lie. There has to be something she wants in return. "And what's in it for you?" He asks, unable to believe that he's having a sane conversation with her. If he were any other person, he would have high tailed it out of there when he saw her eyes turn red for the first time. Any normal person would have laughed when she said  _demon_ , but for some reason, Cooper finds himself still standing in the parking lot, staring at the pretty girl in front of him and actually  _believing_ her.

" _Oh,_ you caught me there," She says, stalking up to him. Cooper freezes on the spot as she approaches him, and takes in a sharp breath when she puts an arm around his waist, pulling him close. "Ten years," She whispers in his ear, "You get ten  _long_  years with baby brother, and then  _I_  get you."

"You  _get_  me?" He asks incredulously, "What does that mean?"

"It means you get ten years to live, and then I get your  _soul_ , Cooper," She whispers back, pulling away to see the look in his eyes when she says it, " _Aww_ , now don't look so worried. You get  _ten_   _years_  with Blaine. That's much more than you're about to get now. It's a pretty good deal, if you ask me."

"I – I don't know," He finally mutters out, looking down to avoid her eyes.

"Fine," She replies shortly, instantly pulling away from him and straightening herself out, "Suit yourself. I tried to help you. Don't come crying to me when he doesn't wake up."

At that, she turns on her heel and begins to walk away into the parking lot. And though Cooper is sure that he's going insane – though he's sure that there's no such thing as  _demons_  – he can't help but call out to her. "Wait!"

When she turns around, she can't hide the small smile playing on her lips, "Yes?"

"Can… Can I think about it?"

"You know, this is sort of a once in a lifetime offer," She replies, making her way back toward him, " _But_ … I can't resist that sad little face of yours. You have two days. My offer still stands for two days."

...

Cooper walks in the front door that night with shaky hands, and is glad that his parents are either asleep or still at the hospital when he makes his way up to his room. The second the bedroom door is shut behind him, he's sliding down the wood and onto the floor, threading his fingers through his hair and trying to sort things out in his head. Trying to make sense of everything.

His conversation with the mysterious girl runs through his head again and again as he tries to come up with some logical explanation for it, but he can't think of anything. Instead, all he can hear in the back of his head is  _demon demon demon, she's a demon and she wants your soul_ , and he can't help but feel crazy. Absolutely crazy. Because demons aren't supposed to be real.

Yet, when Cooper finally finds his way to his bed that night, all he can see when he closes his eyes are a pair of red ones staring right back at him. And he can't deny that what he saw was real.

He stays in his room the entirety of the next day, laying in bed and trying to make sense of things. He can't bring himself to visit Blaine.

Cooper finds himself at the hospital the day after, though, with his family, and things are exactly the same. He can't bring himself to look at Blaine's still body laying in the hospital bed, knowing that there may be something he can do to save him, and he can't bring himself to hug his own mother when she starts sobbing again as the doctor repeats  _we don't know if he'll wake up_.

_She was right. He's not going to wake up._

"You have to do  _something_ ," His mother chokes out, wiping her eyes with her sleeves, "Please. Anything."

The doctor can't even bring himself to look her in the eyes when he repeats, "We've tried everything. There's nothing we can do," again.

And that just about does it for Cooper.

After her outburst, Cooper's father leads his mother out of the room, leaving him alone with Blaine and his thoughts. He lets himself stare – for the first time in two days – at his brother's still form, and can't help the pang of guilt he feels when he realizes that he  _can_ do something, even if the doctors can't. He suddenly can't bear being in the room alone anymore, knowing that it's  _his_ fault that Blaine got hut and only  _he_  can fix it. With one last look in his little brother's direction, he stands from his chair in the corner of the room and makes his way toward the door.

He knows it's stupid and crazy, but just minutes after his parents exit the room, Cooper finds himself walking toward the front doors of the hospital.

"Cooper," His father calls when he sees him leaving, "Where are you going?"

Cooper swallows the lump in his throat before speaking, "Out. I'll be back in a bit." And without so much as a glance in his father's direction, he's walking out the front doors of the hospital and into the cool fall air.

The drive to the small bar is silent and seems to go on forever. Cooper's heart is pounding in his chest when he finally pulls into the parking lot, and though he still feels like he's crazy for believing the girl, he swallows the lump in his throat and tries to tell himself that he's doing the right thing.

He isn't even halfway through the parking lot, making his way to the bar, when someone startles him.

"Looking for someone?"

Her voice rings out over the mostly empty parking lot, and Cooper spins on his heel, searching for the source of the voice. And it takes a minute, but then he sees her, standing out on the dirt road, smirking in his direction. Cooper feels his stomach drop because  _she definitely wasn't there a minute ago,_ but he ignores it and starts to make his way toward the woman.

"I see you've come around, Cooper," She teases when he gets close enough to talk. And when he doesn't say anything in response, she just smirks, "And I see you're still playing the whole  _silent but dangerous_ card."

"I thought about it," Cooper finally says, crossing his arms over his chest.

"And…" She says smiling, "I'm sure you didn't come all this way to tell me no, but I'm assuming this is a deal?"

"Blaine will be better?" Cooper asks, still somewhat unsure. Still somewhat terrified.

"Good as new," She affirms, "And you'll get ten  _long_ years with your healthy,  _beautiful_  baby brother."

A thought crosses his mind, but he pushes it down as soon as it appears. Apparently not fast enough for her to miss, though.

"You know I can only give you  _one_ thing, right?" She asks, looking at him carefully, "I may be able to wake him up, but if you want baby brother to fall in love with you… Well, you're going to have to work that one out on your own."

"I know," He mutters.

"So…"

"Okay," Cooper says quietly, keeping eye contact with her and waiting for her eyes to go red again, "I'm in. What do we do?"

"Nothing," She replies, taking a step forward, "We just need to seal the deal." And at that, her eyes flash red and she reaches forward, pulling their lips together in a searing kiss.

It only lasts a couple of seconds. Her lips are there, hot and wet and heavy, and then they're gone. She flashes a breathless Cooper a smile before speaking up again.

"Might want to get to the hospital."

Within seconds, Cooper is running – full on sprinting to his car – and peeling out of the parking lot, heart racing. And a pair of red eyes watch him as he takes off toward town.

He gets to the hospital in record time, forgets to lock his car up, and slams the doors of hospital open, earning a few odd glances from some nurses. His parents are still there, sitting in the waiting room like they had been when he left, and that worries him. If Blaine were up, they'd be there. So he passes them quickly and makes his way to Blaine's room, feeling sick to his stomach.

When he gets there, though, Blaine is still lying in his bed, motionless. Asleep.

Within seconds, he goes from nervous, anxious and excited to devastated and frustrated and disappointed. He sighs out, hands coming up and fingers running through his hair, panicked.

_She lied. She lied. He's not awake. She lied. She-_

Something out of the corner of Cooper's eye catches his attention and he doesn't know whether to be surprised or furious when he sees that girl – demon – standing next to him, arms crossed.

"You didn't think I'd make you miss the best part, did you?" She asks, breaking the silence before he has the chance to say anything. She then nods toward Blaine's bed, and Cooper's heart practically stops because-

_Because_  he can see Blaine's sharp intake of breath. He can see his eyelids flutter open. He can hear the machines in the room going crazy. And he's about to step toward the bed – toward Blaine – when doctors come rushing in and push him to the side. He doesn't care though. He doesn't care when he's kicked out of the room and is left standing alone in the hall with the demon. He doesn't care because Blaine is up. He's alive and he's awake and that's all that matters.

"Thank you," He whispers out, turning to look at the girl next to him. He shouldn't be thanking her. His clock is already ticking. She didn't do him a favor. He had to pay the price. But regardless, Blaine is  _there_  and that's all that matters.

"See you in ten years, Cooper," She says softly, almost like she doesn't want to, and then she's gone. _  
_


	2. All Roads Lead Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Don't," Blaine interrupts, "I know what you're going to say, and just… Don't."
> 
> "But-"
> 
> "No buts," Blaine insists, "I can't have you beating yourself up because you feel like it's your fault or you feel like you let me down or because you think you're a terrible brother or whatever. Because you're not. Okay? You're just… You're not."
> 
> Cooper can feel tears gathering in his eyes at his words and it takes all he has to nod, "Okay."
> 
> "Really," Blaine continues, as if that wasn't enough, "I know. We're brothers, alright? So I know you have a guilty conscience just like I do. But don't. Because you're here. And I know you'd do anything for me, just like I'd do anything for you."
> 
> "You have no idea…" Cooper mutters under his breath, looking down.

The doctors call it a miracle.

They can't find any traces of trauma or internal bleeding in Blaine x-rays. In fact, as Blaine's doctor puts it, it's as if it never happened. He's good as new. He even walks out of the hospital on his own when they tell the Andersons that he's good to go.

Their mother cries. God, she cries. Tears of happiness, of course, but she still cries. In fact, everyone is overwhelmed when Blaine wakes up. Even their father. And that takes a lot.

Their family stays the night at the hospital that night, despite Blaine telling them that they can go – that he'll still be there in the morning. He either doesn't quite grasp the fact that he's been out for almost a month, or he tries not to think about it. Knowing Blaine, it's probably the latter. He's always been so selfless, and  _of course_  he doesn't want his family to stay up all night worrying.

Instead, they stay at the hospital. Their parents sit with him for a few hours, talking to him, telling him how much they love him, and  _that_ brings tears to Cooper's eyes as he watches from the hallway because their family is  _never_  this close. Never.

Once Blaine is yawning – and Cooper's not sure if he's actually tired or if he's just trying to get some alone time – their parents finally leave the room, beaming. Cooper doesn't follow them out into the familiar waiting room. Instead, he stays there, standing outside of Blaine's room, watching. Blaine doesn't realize he's out there at first, but when he turns to look out the window and sees Cooper, he smiles. And Cooper takes that as his cue to go inside.

He was there when Blaine first woke up. Of course he was. He was there when the doctor explained everything, and he was there to hug Blaine and tell him he loved him, but he hadn't been alone with him. Not yet. He hadn't had the chance to actually  _talk_ to Blaine.

He pulls a chair up next to Blaine's bed and sits, smiling at his little brother, "How are you feeling?"

Blaine smiles, "Great, actually."

"Tired?" Cooper asks, concerned. He doesn't want to keep him up if he is.

"Coop, I've been sleeping for what… Three weeks? I think sleep can wait," Blaine teases, but Cooper can see past it. He can see the pain in Blaine's eyes that comes with the fact that he  _was_  asleep for the better part of a month.

At that, Cooper reaches forward, his hand on Blaine's arm. It's been so long since he's been able to look at Blaine without wanting to die. So long since he's been able to talk to him and touch him and  _God,_  now he feels like shit. "Blaine…" He starts.

"Don't," Blaine interrupts, "I know what you're going to say, and just… Don't."

"But-"

"No buts," Blaine insists, "I can't have you beating yourself up because you feel like it's your fault or you feel like you let me down or because you think you're a terrible brother or  _whatever_. Because you're not. Okay? You're just… You're not."

Cooper can feel tears gathering in his eyes at his words and it takes all he has to nod, "Okay."

"Really," Blaine continues, as if that wasn't enough, "I know. We're brothers, alright? So I know you have a guilty conscience just like I do. But don't. Because you're here. And I know you'd do anything for me, just like I'd do anything for you."

"You have no idea…" Cooper mutters under his breath, looking down.

At that, Blaine suddenly sits up, hand soft against Cooper's cheek and Cooper looks up at him through his lashes. "I love you, Coop," He says suddenly, and Cooper's heart swells. Of course, he doesn't mean it the way that Cooper wants him to, but it's okay because Blaine loves him and doesn't hate him and he's awake and everything is finally  _okay_.

"I'm so glad you're okay," Cooper says softly, and then he's pulling Blaine in for a tight hug.

...

The first few months are tough. Despite the fact that Blaine has virtually no recovering to do, he's horribly behind on school work, and their parents are working on pressing charges on the kids who jumped him – despite Blaine insisting that they don't have to – and well… There's a lot of catching up to do.

Cooper stays at home. He screwed himself out of the part he got in California by not calling back, but he doesn't care. Not when he needs to look after Blaine. So instead of going back out west, he stays home in case Blaine needs him. Their parents insist that Blaine transfers schools – something about Dalton academy, an all boys school with a zero tolerance bullying policy – so Cooper stays and helps him get ready to transfer and helps his family, too. Because if Blaine is going to be at a safer school, then it's worth the extra help Cooper has to do around the house. It's worth the part time job he has to get to help out.

And it turns out that Blaine fits in at Dalton pretty well. He joins their show choir – The Warblers, if Cooper remembers correctly – and finds friends who actually accept him for who he is. Only two months after transferring, Blaine comes out. And though their parents kind of had an idea that he was gay – they  _did_  have to listen to the police report from that night, after all – they still accept him. It's hard for their father, but he tries. Thank God.

Three months after Blaine is back at school, he seems to forget about Cooper, which the older Anderson is oddly okay with because it's what he wanted for Blaine. He wanted him to wake up, to have a normal life and find friends. Find love. He wants Blaine to be able to do what he couldn't, had he been in a coma. So it doesn't bother Cooper too much when he and Blaine don't hang out as much as they did before and right after he got out of the hospital. Because Blaine is happy.

_And Cooper tries not to think about the fact that he's only got nine years and nine months left with his baby brother._

...

It's about five months after Blaine is back in school that he finally voices his concern to Cooper.

Around eight on a Friday night, there's a knock at Cooper's bedroom door. Assuming that it's one of his parents, he calls out  _come in_  without even looking up from his laptop. What he doesn't expect is to see Blaine, wearing sweats and a t-shirt (because he's still not too fond of his tie and blazer yet) standing in his doorway.

Cooper smiles warmly, "Hey, B. What's up?"

Blaine shrugs, "Nothing. Are you busy?"

At that, he shuts his laptop, "Not at all." He then notices the worried look on Blaine's face and frowns, "You okay?"

Blaine shakes his head, "Yeah, I'm fine." He takes a step into Cooper's room and closes the door behind himself.

"You sure?" Cooper asks, concerned. Blaine isn't usually like this.

Blaine doesn't say anything. Instead, he wordlessly makes his way across the room and sits down on Cooper's bed next to him. "Are you happy, Cooper?" He asks, finally breaking the silence.

Cooper's eyebrows pull together in confusion, "Yeah, of course."

"Really," Blaine pushes, as if he doesn't believe him.

"Yes, really," Cooper replies, sitting up straighter, "Is everything okay, B?"

"Yeah, it's fine. It's just…" Blaine sighs, "Look, Cooper. I don't want you to stay here for me."

Cooper narrows his eyes in confusion, "What?"

"I know what you're doing," Blaine explains, "You're staying here because you're worried about me. But you don't need to be. Really. It's okay. I'm alright now. I don't want you to put your life on hold for me… You know?"

"I'm not-" Cooper stutters, "I'm not putting my life on hold."

"Did you get the part?" Blaine asks, as if out of nowhere.

"What?"

"The part," Blaine says, "The one that you went to try out for before my accident. Did you get it?"

Cooper sighs, knowing exactly where this is going. He wants to lie, just to prove a point, but he can't. Not to Blaine. "Yes," He answers after a moment.

"So what happened?"

Cooper looks down, avoiding Blaine's eyes, "I turned it down. I didn't take it."

"Why?" Blaine pushes.

"You know why," Cooper snaps. He softens his voice when he sees the hurt look in Blaine's eyes though. "I couldn't just leave you…" He murmurs, looking down, "I wouldn't."

"I know," Blaine says softly, reaching out, "But I'm okay now. And it's going to kill me if you don't go out there and follow your dreams just because you want to look after me."

"But-"

"No buts," Blaine says, "I'm better now.  _Everything_ is better, now. Things are good at Dalton and I have friends who accept me and love me… Really. I want you to do this."

"Blaine-"

"For me," He insists.

Cooper manages a smile, "Now that's not fair."

"Yes it is," Blaine replies, smiling back. "Nothing would make me happier than seeing you follow your dream. And then, ya'know… When you're some big actor or whatever and want to get away for a while, I'll still be here."

Cooper immediately leans in, pulling Blaine into a tight hug, "I love you."

Blaine laughs, soft and lighthearted, "Love you too, Coop."

...

So Cooper does leave. It takes a couple of weeks for him to find a place to live and to pack up his things, but he finally goes out to California. He promises that it won't be too long when he hugs Blaine goodbye in the driveway, car packed full of his things. "If I can't find anything, I'm coming back," He says, pulling away, "You can't get rid of me  _that_ easy."

Blaine smiles up at him, "You'll find something. I know you will."

And at that, Cooper climbs into his car and pulls away, watching as his little brother gets smaller and smaller in his rear view mirror.

And he tries not to think about the fact that he'll surely be gone for a while. And now he only has nine years and seven months. And twelve days. But who's counting?

He finds a job. Of course he finds a job. He's  _Cooper Anderson_ , for crying out loud. There's a little commercial here, a small TV appearance there, and soon he's got his own apartment in California and enough money to pay the bills. Before he knows it, it's been three months and Blaine is almost out of school for the summer.

In the beginning, he calls on a regular basis. But then he gets busy with work and Blaine gets busy with school and The Warblers, and when Cooper  _does_  have the time to call, Blaine usually doesn't answer. He's doing good though, or at least that's what their mom tells Cooper, and that's good.

"He's got a boyfriend, now," She says to Cooper one night on the phone.

"Does he?" Cooper asks. He can't tell if the aching feeling in his heart is because he's happy for his brother – happy that he's found someone – or if he's heartbroken. He shoves the second thought down, though, because it's his  _brother_  for crying out loud. He's not allowed to be heartbroken when Blaine finds someone. It would be selfish, actually.

Hell, maybe Blaine's even found someone he can be with for a while. That would be good for him. He deserves it, after everything he has been through. He deserves someone who can be there for him for the rest of his life. Someone to love and kiss and make cookies for – because  _God_  he makes awesome cookies – and someone have once his older brother is gone.

It would be selfish for Cooper to be jealous, because he's only got nine years and four months left now. It would be selfish of Cooper to break Blaine's heart in nine years, if they were to be together. Which obviously wouldn't happen in the first place.

"Yeah," His mom replies, "His name is Kurt. Cute kid, really. He's in a glee club at another school. From what Blaine says, he's got a great voice… You'll have to meet him when you're back in town."

"Yeah," Cooper agrees, "Definitely."

He doesn't come back for the summer, though.

It's not that Cooper is lonely in his apartment, sulking because his baby brother has someone and will never love him and he's going to die in nine years and three months. It's actually because he's busy. Really, really busy.

Cooper meets a girl in mid May. A spunky redheaded girl named Anna, and they hit it off immediately. By late June, they're self declared best friends and he's moving into her house because she  _insists_ that he does so. "Cooper, it's three times the size of your place and you'll be paying less rent. And you'll be living with me. And well… I'm awesome. So you can't say no," She says, grinning over a cup of coffee one afternoon.

He sighs, but it's not because he's annoyed. It's because it's  _Anna_  and she knows exactly how to get him. "Fine," He replies, "My lease is up at the end of the month anyway. You better help me move."

...

He talks to Blaine here and there whenever he gets the chance, but it's not as often as he wishes. He hears more and more about Kurt; about how Blaine wants to move to New York with him and their friends once he graduates, about how he's amazing and funny and _Cooper you have to meet him_ , and Cooper does his best to smile, sound cheerful and reply with a, "Yeah, Sport, of course. Next time I'm in town we should all go out and get something to eat."

Anna notices how weird Cooper is about the subject of his brother, but she doesn't pry. She's a good friend, and she knows when not to. But she knows all about Blaine's accident – about how broken up it left Cooper. She  _doesn't_  know about the whole demon thing, but Cooper decides he might tell her one day. One day, when  _he_  actually accepts that it really happened to him.

By the time Blaine is a Junior in high school, Cooper still hasn't come out to visit him.

He hears from their mom about how Blaine transferred to McKinley High School – Kurt's school – and for some reason, that  _really_  upsets him. That's the first time that Cooper decides that he doesn't like this Kurt kid.

"Blaine's always been so strong minded," Cooper says over a glass of wine with Anna that night after he talks to his mom, "I never saw him as the type to change or move for someone."

"Maybe he really likes this Kurt guy," Anna offers, shrugging.

"Of course he does," Cooper groans, "But that's what bugs me. This kid is a year older than Blaine and is all sorts of excited to move out to New York when he graduates and then what? He's just going to leave Blaine at this school, with people he doesn't know, like he's nothing?"

"Jesus," Anna mutters, "Protective, much?"

"I'm not-" Cooper starts, but she just raises her eyebrows. He lets out a breath, "Fine, I'm protective. But I have every right to be! He's my little brother. I don't want him to get hurt."

"Mhmm," Anna hums, standing to grab the bottle of wine.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Cooper asks, watching her.

At that, she just shoots him a little smile before topping off his glass, "I think you know."

...

So a couple of months later, Cooper decides to go visit his family.

Things don't really go as amazingly with Blaine as he thought they would, either. Apparently, Blaine has needed his brother in his life a little more than he let on, and it causes the two of them to fight when he goes to visit him at school. They make up – of course they make up, Cooper wouldn't leave until they did – and by the end of the two weeks that Cooper is in town, everything is back to normal. Well, as normal as things can be.

Blaine has grown up  _a lot_  in the past nine months. He's not the weak, defenseless baby brother that Cooper remembers. He's taken up boxing – and god, are his muscles toned – and his style has definitely changed, as well as his hair. And he's  _shaving_. But he's still Blaine. And that's what matters.

"I'm sorry I snapped at you the other day," Blaine says, sitting cross legged with Cooper on his bed one night, "I didn't mean to. I was just… frustrated, I guess."

"It's okay," Cooper says softly, smiling at him.

"It's just… A lot has changed since you were here last," Blaine admits, looking down, "I know I told you that I wanted you to go out to California and chase your dream, but I guess I miss having my brother around, you know?"

"I know," Cooper replies quickly, "God, I know. Don't think that I don't miss you when I'm out there…"

"Promise you'll come home more often?" Blaine asks, looking up at Cooper through his lashes and  _God,_  who could say no to that face? Not Cooper, obviously.

"Promise," He manages to choke out.

And he does come see Blaine. Not as often as he'd like – he's busy with work – but he tries more. He even comes home for Thanksgiving and Christmas. Kurt is there for Christmas and as much as he wants to be happy for Blaine – because Kurt is so nice, he's so, so nice and good looking – he can't be. It's selfish and he knows it, but he keeps that to himself.

_Eight years and nine months, now._

He comes home once over the summer, too. Blaine is busy most of the time that he's home, but he decides that maybe that's for the best.

It isn't until the beginning of Blaine's Senior year (about eight years, now, if he's counting) that things get… interesting.

It's about ten at night on a Friday – Cooper is out with Anna and some of their friends – when his phone rings. When he sees Blaine's name on his screen, he immediately excuses himself and steps outside of the bar to answer. Blaine's been having trouble dealing with Kurt being gone in New York, (just as Cooper had expected) so he knows he needs to answer.

"Hey Blaine," He answers once he's far away enough from the bar to hear him, "What's up?"

"Cooper?" Blaine's voice sounds small, wavering. He sniffles, and Cooper already knows that he's been crying.

"Yeah, Blaine. I'm right here," He says softly, "What's going on?"

"Oh Coop," Blaine sobs into the phone, "I fucked up. I fucked up so bad… I don't know what to do."

"Blaine, calm down," He says soothingly, "Tell me what happened."

"I'm in New York," He says between short, choppy breaths. "I went to go and see Kurt and things were going great and-"

"What did he do?" Cooper asks immediately, already feeling the anger bubbling up into his chest. He knew it. He knew that Kurt wasn't good for him. He knew-

"It was me," Blaine says, quickly, "I cheated on him."

"You what?" Cooper asks, taken off guard.

"I know, it's fucked up. I'm so stupid, and I don't expect you do understand. I'm such an idiot, Cooper, but I needed someone to talk to and-"

"You're not an idiot," Cooper says immediately, "Don't you dare say that."

"I am, though," Blaine sobs, "I fucked this up. Kurt is the best thing to happen to me. I don't even know why I did it. I guess I was lonely, but it didn't mean anything. And now Kurt's gone and I'm all alone in this park and  _oh god_  all of my stuff is at his apartment. Cooper-"

"Stop, Blaine," Cooper interrupts, voice a little hard, "Please don't beat yourself up. You're human. It happens."

"But it shouldn't have," Blaine says, sniffling again.

"But it did," Cooper counters, "And I know it's not easy right now… And I know that you're the one dealing with this and I'm not, but you need to believe me when I say that everything happens for a reason, okay?"

"That's such bullshit," Blaine says, laughing a little.

"Got you to smile, though," Cooper replies, smiling.

"A little," Blaine counters, but then his voice is down again, "I don't know what to do, Coop."

"I know," Cooper replies, and  _god_  this would be easier if he wasn't a little buzzed right now, "But really. Believe me. Kurt  _is not_  the best thing that's happened to you. He's not the best thing that's  _going_  to happen to you. You're  _Blaine Anderson_ , for crying out loud. You have so much greatness ahead of you."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Blaine asks, voice wavering.

"It means that you're talented, and compassionate, and beautiful, and anyone would be lucky to have you," Cooper says, "And yeah, maybe you messed up, but you're human. Did Kurt really expect you just to  _wait_ for him?"

"Don't blame him," Blaine argues.

"No," Cooper says, "I have every right to blame him a little. I'm your big brother and I'm looking out for you, and  _nobody_  leaves you behind. You got that? Nobody. You'll find someone better."

"I've got to go," Blaine says suddenly, "Finn's calling me. I'm sure he's wondering where I am."

Cooper sighs, "Alright. Well, just be safe, B. And call me, okay? I'm always here."

"I know," Blaine replies.

"I love you," Cooper breaths. And  _God_ , it's the truth.

"I love you too," Blaine replies, and then he's gone.

...

The next time that Cooper sees Blaine is graduation. He and Kurt never got back together, but despite Cooper's pleas for Blaine to transfer back to Dalton, he graduates at McKinley. Cooper spends the afternoon sitting with his parents, cheering as Blaine crosses the stage, and meeting his friends when it's all over. There's a small party at their house later, too, which ends kind of late. Cooper stays up with Blaine, though, until all of his friends leave and until their parents go to bed and then it's just the two of them on the couch.

"Hey Coop?" Blaine asks suddenly, breaking the silence between them. There's a movie on TV that they've been watching pretty intently (surprisingly) and they're both sitting cross-legged on the couch, eating leftover cake from the party.

"Yeah?" Cooper replies, swallowing his bite and turning to look at him.

"There's uh… There's something I've been meaning to talk to you about…" Blaine says, voice careful, calculated, as if he's been planning this conversation out in his head throughout the movie. "I didn't really know how to talk to you about it so I kept putting it off, but I kind of need to now…"

A million thoughts run through Coopers head. The most prominent one being:  _Oh my god he found out about the deal_   _how did he find out about it? What am I supposed to tell him?_  Instead of freaking out, like he is internally, though, he just smiles and sets his plate on his legs, "What's up, B?"

Blaine takes a deep breath. "Well… I uh… I've been applying to a couple of schools. I know it's a little late and I probably wouldn't start until spring semester, and I haven't even heard back from them yet, but most of them are out in California…" He trails off.

"And…" Cooper pushes a little, letting out an internal deep breath at the fact that it  _isn't_ about his deal.

Blaine closes his eyes then, as if doing so will make what he's about to say easier, then blurts, "I want to move out to California with you."

Cooper's eyes widen, "You what?"

"I know it's a stupid idea and I haven't heard back from anywhere and I might not get accepted anywhere out there but I figured it would be better than living on my own out there and even if I don't go to school anything is better than Ohio and-"

"Blaine," Cooper says, cutting him off. He's been rambling and his mouth is still hanging open when Cooper speaks, "It's not a stupid idea."

"It's not?" He asks, eyes wide.

Cooper chuckles, "No, not at all. Have you talked to mom and dad about it?"

Blaine nods, "Yeah, a little bit. I don't know how they feel, but I'm sure they'll support it no matter what. And I have a ton of money saved up and I'll pull my weight around the place and-"

"Blaine," Cooper cuts him off again, smiling "You don't have to try to convince me. I'm on board."

"Really?" Blaine asks, just short from bouncing excitedly in his seat.

Cooper smiles, "Yeah. It's a great idea. We just have to make sure it's okay with Anna."

Blaine lunges forward at that, enveloping Cooper in a hug, his cake and plate crashing to the ground in the process. And Cooper hugs back, trying not to think about how Anna (and her odd way of knowing everything) will react, and trying not to think about how this  _might_  not be good for his  _feelings_  for Blaine. But if it's what Blaine wants, it's what he wants.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, it's a filler chapter, but I wanted this story to build slow. I promise the next one will make up for it!


	3. Kiss Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Kiss me like you wanna be loved_  
>  You wanna be loved  
> You wanna be loved  
> This feels like falling in love  
> Falling in love  
> We're falling in love 

It takes about a month to get everything situated, but eventually, Blaine  _does_ move out to California with Cooper. He's not set to start school until January, and it's only going to be a couple of classes, so until then, he hunts for a job and pulls his weight (just as he promised he would) around the place.

_If he's counting, he's at about seven years, now._

Blaine finds a job at a little coffee shop down the street (of course he does, it's totally a  _Blaine_  job) and within a month of moving to California, he's got a decent paying job, a place to live with Cooper and Anna, and even a few friends.

Within two months of moving, Blaine is out with friends more often than he's home. Naturally, of course. Blaine is a social butterfly, and he fits in  _perfectly_  in California. It's as if he was born to move out there. It shouldn't bother Cooper as much as it does, but apparently he's selfish and self-loathing and jealous of his brother's  _friends_.

Anna notices it. Of course she does. She seems to know Cooper better than he knows himself. And she says something about it one night, when she and Cooper get home from the bar. Blaine is still out with friends and it's past midnight and Cooper immediately goes to text him or call him to make sure that he's alright. Anna snatches his phone from his hands.

"Cooper, this has  _got_  to stop," She says, holding the phone just out of his grasp when he reaches for it. They're both a little buzzed, but she's obviously sober enough to realize that Cooper is doing what he does best – worrying about Blaine – and he's sober enough to know that she's probably right.

He sighs, dropping his hand to his side and she sticks his phone in her pocket. "I know…" He breathes out after a moment, sitting on the back of the couch. Anna takes a seat across from him on a barstool, watching him carefully.

"This is about his accident, isn't it?" She asks, knowingly.

Cooper sighs, "I suppose."

She raises an eyebrow, "You suppose?"

He shakes his head, "There's  _so_  much more to it, Anna."

At that, she grins, reaching forward to grab his hand, "Enlighten me."

He sighs, trying to think of the right way to tell the story. The whole story. "I was supposed to chaperone his dance that night," He starts, looking down. No matter how many times he thinks about it or tries to make himself feel better about it, he still feels guilty. "I was supposed to be there for him, and instead I came out here. Instead of being there for my brother when he needed me most, I was selfish."

Anna shakes her head, "You weren't selfish. How were you to know what was going to happen?"

"It doesn't matter," Cooper argues, "I wasn't there for him and he needed me."

"But it's not your fault," Anna replies, gripping Cooper's hand hard, "And he's better now…"

Cooper shakes his head, trying to hold back tears, "Yeah, yeah… I know. It's just… It's hard to forgive myself, you know?"

She smiles a sad smile, "I know. And I know that you want to protect him now, because you'd die if anything happened to him again, but he's a big boy, Cooper. He can take care of himself. Didn't you even say that he took up boxing after the accident?"

Cooper sighs, "Yeah. And yeah, I know he can. I just worry, is all."

"You just  _love him_ , is all," She replies, smiling.

"Sometimes a little too much," Cooper agrees, choking out a little laugh.

"I know," Anna says, and it sounds loaded. Cooper looks up at her – at the knowing smile on her face – and his heart almost stops.

"You-"

" _I know_ ," She just repeats, still smiling.

"But I – you – how?" Cooper stutters, heart now pounding in his chest.

She just shrugs, as if it's nothing, "I'm good at reading people."

"And you don't… I mean – you…" Cooper trails off, still stunned.

"I don't care," She replies, shrugging again, "I suppose I'm really fucking open minded."

"Apparently…" Cooper breaths, still trying to take it in because this is the  _most_  he's ever talked about his feelings for Blaine (save for that time with the demon) and it feels…  _different_. Good, but different. Like a weight off of his shoulders.

"You know he's still going to make his own choices, though, right?" She asks after a long, quiet moment, watching Cooper.

He sighs, "I know. I don't care if he ever feels the same. I just… I want him to be happy. I worry about him."

"I know," Anna replies, leaning forward to squeeze Cooper's shoulder, "You're a good brother."

He's not sure if that compliment should hurt or not. He smiles, regardless. "Thanks, Anna. For everything."

She smiles back, "Anytime."

 

And he doesn't tell her  _everything._  He doesn't tell her about his deal, but he figures that's enough for one night. It's more than enough. At least someone knows now. Someone knows, and isn't judging him because of it. He has someone to talk to about it. And that makes him feel better than he has in a  _long_ time.

...

Mid November, Blaine gets a boyfriend. It's this guy he meets at the coffee shop. Apparently he comes in every day and orders the same thing and finally asked Blaine out one day. Cooper hears all about how great and sweet and charming and attractive the guy is before Blaine leaves for the date, shutting the door before Cooper has the chance to tell him to be careful.

Anna isn't there to comfort Cooper – she's out of town, visiting friends and family for Thanksgiving or something – and Cooper decides against calling her about it.  _He's a_   _grown man, damn it_ , and he can handle it on his own. Or that's what he tells himself. He knew it was only a matter of time before Blaine found someone else, but it doesn't make it hurt any less.

_As long as he's happy, though. Right?_

Blaine and the guy – Nathan, if Cooper remembers correctly – break up late in December.

And Cooper kisses Blaine for the first time a day later.

In his defense, he doesn't mean for it to work out that way. It just does.

Cooper is being a good older brother, comforting Blaine when he tells him about the break-up the next day. He even runs out to buy Blaine some beer and forces one into his hand that night while he's sitting on the couch, wallowing in self pity.

"He's the first guy I've dated since Kurt," Blaine says once he's on his second beer, voice numb. Just the mention of  _Kurt_  stings Cooper, but he brushes it off. Before he can say anything comforting, Blaine is going on. "Maybe it's some kind of karma."

"Yeah, cause you're  _such_ a terrible person," Cooper says sarcastically, trying to lighten the mood a bit. It doesn't work.

"It makes sense," Blaine says, ignoring Cooper, "I cheated on Kurt. I kind of deserved it."

"Oh Jesus Christ," Cooper breaths out. He sets his beer down and leans forward, "You don't  _deserve_  it, Blaine. The guy was an asshole. It's not your fault that he couldn't see what he had."

"Will you stop talking like that?" Blaine says, looking up to meet Cooper's eyes.

"Like what?"

"Like I'm some kind of saint," Blaine spits out, "Because I'm not. It's not like I've been a perfect boyfriend in the past, either."

"Blaine…" Cooper says, voice sad. The fact that Blaine thinks so little of himself makes his chest ache.

"Stop acting like I'm something special," He continues, "I know you're trying to make me feel better, but stop. I fucked things up with Kurt, and yes, I'm over that, but don't sit here and act like I deserve much more than what I've got, because I don't."

"Blaine, stop it," Cooper snaps, voice hard, "Don't talk about yourself like that. Everyone messes up. Just because you did once,  _over a year ago_ , doesn't mean that you don't deserve to be happy!"

"Jesus Christ, Cooper," Blaine spits, slamming his beer on the table and standing up, "Just quit. I don't know what gave you the idea that I'm so fucking  _perfect_ , but I'm not! Okay? I'm sick of you telling me that someone will realize how  _amazing_ or  _beautiful_ or  _wonderful_  I am one day, just to make me feel better. It's a lie, Cooper, and for once,  _right now_ , I'd just appreciate the truth."

"You want the truth?" Cooper bellows, standing as well and following Blaine to the kitchen. When Blaine just turns and crosses his arms, waiting for him to continue, he does. "The truth is, I  _know_  you could do better than these assholes that you settle for. I'm sick of seeing you beat yourself up and punish yourself over shit you can't change!" Cooper watches as Blaine's face twists from something that is angry and frustrated and resigned to something softer, sadder. He takes a deep breath and continues, softer. " _Truth is_ , Blaine, you  _are_  beautiful and amazing and perfect and I  _wish_  you could see it as clear as I can."

"Cooper, I-" Blaine starts, but is promptly cut off by a firm pair of lips on his own.

The kiss is sudden. It's not something Cooper had been planning – in fact, it's something he never wanted to do unless Blaine wanted it, but he can't help it. Part of him feels like it's the only way he can prove to Blaine that  _someone_ loves him. Even if it's his own brother.

To Cooper's surprise, Blaine doesn't push away, either. His hands come up to Cooper's chest as if to shove away, but instead, he grips the fabric of the shirt tight, keeping their bodies close together. It isn't until Cooper needs to catch his breath that he finally pulls away.

Blaine's eyes are still closed when they part, and Cooper takes that moment to take everything in – his parted lips, his sharp intake of breath, flushed cheeks – before Blaine opens his eyes and it's all over.

He expects rage. Disgust. Anger.

What he gets is a slightly confused look and a little brother, cocking his head to the side and saying with a small, out of breath voice, "What was that?"

Cooper takes a deep breath, running his fingers through his hair. He avoids Blaine's eyes when he answers, "I don't know."

And he expects yelling, cursing, questions. He expects anything but the soft touch of Blaine's hand on his cheek and the feeling of his breath on his lips before they're on his own again. And Cooper can't help but relax into the touch, because it feels like every moment in his life has been leading up to this. To the feeling of Blaine's lips on his own. The feeling of Blaine's body pressed against his own.

Blaine pulls away after a moment, and instead of backing up or looking at Cooper or  _saying_  anything, he nuzzles his face into his older brother's chest, arms wrapped around his waist and mutters out a soft, "Thank you."

Cooper isn't sure exactly  _what_  he's thanking him for, but he pulls him closer, stoking his hair.

...

He wakes the next morning with Blaine in his bed next to him.

And to Cooper's surprise, Blaine's eyes are already open and he smiles when they meet Cooper's. It's a genuine smile, one that crinkles around his eyes and he looks perfect, hair disheveled, laying in bed next to Cooper, morning light filtering in through the curtains.

"Hey," Cooper says softly. It might not be the most poetic thing ever, but it's the first thing that comes to mind.

Blaine's smile holds. "Hey."

There are a ton of questions burning at the back of Cooper's mind – the first being  _what the hell is Blaine thinking?_ – but he doesn't voice any of them. Instead, he just stares at the boy laying in the bed next to him.

"Can I kiss you?" Blaine asks, and  _that_  question definitely catches Cooper off guard. He had been expecting something along the lines of  _what the hell happened last night._

Cooper chuckles, "I think we're long past the asking phase."

Blaine laughs too, light and breathy, "Right." Then he leans in, pressing his lips soft and fast to Cooper's, before pulling away again, still grinning.

"Now what?" Cooper asks, breathless as he stares at the boy - his brother - next to him.

Blaine just grins bigger, his cheeks flushing a red, and shrugs, "You're the one who initiated it. I thought you'd know."

"Well I didn't think..." Cooper trails off.

"Didn't think what?" Blaine asks, his brows furrowing

He sighs, "I didn't think it would really... Work out the way I wanted it to. So I  _really_  don't know where to go from here…"

Blaine just smiles, "Then this is new territory for the both of us."

Cooper huffs out a small laugh, "Right." And when it's quiet between the two of them for a moment, when he's had time to really think about what's going on – that he kissed Blaine and  _Blaine didn't punch him or call him fucked up and he actually liked it_ – he can't help but speak up again. "Blaine?"

"Hmm?" Blaine murmurs quietly, eyes now closed. He looks so relaxed. So... Okay with everything. And though Cooper wants to be grateful because of that, he has to ask...

"You're okay with this?"

At that, Blaine's eyes open. He stares at Cooper for a long moment. "I wasn't," He finally says, quietly.

"You  _weren't_?" Cooper asks, and now his heart is pounding because  _oh my god what if Blaine doesn't want this, why did you force yourself on him?_

"Whoa, calm down," Blaine murmurs when he notices Cooper panicking. "I wasn't okay with this when I  _first_  realized how I felt... About you. But I dunno... That part has long since passed, I guess. I just didn't think you'd feel the same-"

"So you never did anything about it," Cooper finishes.

"Right," Blaine replies, smiling a little.

"You're telling me," Cooper sighs, "That we've both wanted this for..."

"Years," Blaine offers.

Cooper raises his eyebrows, "We've both wanted this for  _years_  and neither of us has had the guts to do anything about it?"

Blaine laughs, "Apparently."

Cooper rolls his eyes, "Great."

At that, Blaine nuzzles himself into Cooper's side, his head on his chest and looks up at him with those brown, puppy eyes. "At least we've got each other now," He says softly, smile playing across his lips.

"We've always had each other," Cooper argues back softly, but can't help the way his hand comes around to stroke Blaine's hair.

"But not like this," Blaine retorts, eyes closing at Cooper's touch.

Cooper swallows hard. "You know this isn't going to be easy, right? It's going to be weird and complicated and we won't really be able to tell anyone... Are you sure you want to get yourself into this?" He can't wrap his head around  _why_ , but he gives Blaine one last chance to back out – to decide that maybe it's not a good idea. It could be because, after all the waiting, after all the pining after his little brother, he doesn't want him to have to deal with the hardships of a relationship like the one Cooper wants. Either way, the words come out, and Blaine doesn't even flinch at them.

Instead, the younger Anderson just scoots a little closer and holds on a little tighter, "You're not getting rid of me that easy. Not now."

Cooper smiles, despite some voice, in the back of his head screaming,  _six years, six months and eight days._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title is from "Kiss Me" by Ed Sheeran.


	4. Your Love Is The Best Part

Cooper doesn't really know how, but they figure things out.

Part of him expects Blaine to come to him a few days later and explain that he made a mistake. That he didn't want to be with him after all. But it never happens.

In fact, Christmas passes and so does New Years, and before they know it, they're two weeks into the new year, and things are still the same. Blaine still sleeps in his own room, but he steals little kisses from Cooper here and there when nobody is looking and though Cooper wants to invite him to stay the night in his room on multiple occasions, he resists the urge.

It isn't until Anna says something that Cooper finally caves.

"So when are you planning on telling me? Because I'm kind of getting sick of playing stupid," She says one morning while Cooper cooks breakfast for them. Blaine is at work, so it's just the two of them sitting in the quiet kitchen, TV offering background noise.

"Telling you what?" Cooper asks, oblivious as he piles some pancakes onto a plate and turns off the stove. He joins Anna at the table, where she's already sipping on coffee, and hands her the plate.

"About you and Blaine," She says, as if it's nothing.

"I-" Cooper starts, then shuts his mouth, "What about us?"

She just grins that knowing grin - and god how does she know everything? " _You know_."

Cooper lets out a little chuckle and shakes his head, "Jesus, you're good."

She just grins.

He sighs, "I didn't want to rush him into telling people. I didn't know-"

"It's fine," Anna says, cutting him off with a small laugh, "I'm just giving you shit."

He lets out a deep breath, "Okay."

"But really," She says, voice serious, "I'm happy for you, Cooper."

He smiles, "Thanks."

Anna conveniently plans on staying at a friend's house that night. She leaves as Blaine gets home, with a hand on his shoulder, murmuring something along the lines of  _have fun tonight_.

The second the door closes, Blaine is staring wide eyed at Cooper. "Did she... Does she...?"

Cooper sighs, smiling a little, "She knows."

Blaine's eyebrows shoot up, " _She knows_?"

"Yeah," Cooper says, stepping forward, "And she's fine with it."

"She's... But  _how_?" Blaine asks, still stunned.

Cooper shrugs, "Dunno. But she is."

"Well," Blaine says, clearing his throat and stepping into Cooper's arms, "That's nice."

"Mhmm," Cooper agrees, leaning in to press his lips to Blaine's.

"And she's gone all night?" Blaine asks when they pull apart for a moment.

"She is," Cooper confirms.

At that, Blaine surges forward, pressing their lips back together in a heated kiss.

It's not how Cooper has planned it - and he's thought about it a million times, no matter how much he denies it - but within ten minutes, he has Blaine pressed against his closed bedroom door. And with the way that Blaine is kissing him, his tongue tracing out every corner in his mouth, ( _and how did his brother learn to kiss like that?_ ) he knows exactly where things are headed.

"Blaine," Cooper mutters, breathless when he finally manages to pull away for a second, "Are you sure... about this?"

"How many times do I have to say  _yes_ , Coop?" Blaine replies, not even bothering to open his eyes. He surges forward again, but Cooper stops him.

" _No_ ," He says, keeping his voice soft, "About  _this_?"

When Blaine does open his eyes, they're wide with understanding, "Oh.  _Oh._  Yeah. Yes, I'm sure. God, I'm sure."

Cooper can't help but smile, "Alright. But if you want to stop-"

"I won't," Blaine replies, eyes suddenly going dark with lust, making Cooper's knees go weak, and  _whoa where did he learn that?_

"I - alright," Cooper stutters, then presses back into him, lips attacking his neck.  _Two can play at that game._

Cooper's hands travel down Blaine's sides until he reaches his hands and then he grabs them and in one swift motion, is pulling them up and over his head and pressing them into the door. He holds his wrists together with one hand and with the other, he's turning Blaine's head to get better access at his neck.

"Coop..." Blaine whines out, and he can't tell if it's a warning or if he's asking him to stop, so he pulls away, hoping it's not too much.

"Are you-"

" _Jesus Christ, don't stop_ ," Blaine whines out, and Cooper can't help but smirk before he dives back in, determined to leave a mark for tomorrow.

Within another minute, Blaine is practically grinding on his thigh - or trying to, but not doing so well, due to his arms restricting his movement - and without thinking about it, Cooper lets go of his wrists and grabs at his thighs. Blaine takes the hint and wraps his arms around Cooper's neck and then he's being lifted, legs coming up to wrap around his brother's waist.

Cooper finds his way to the bed and lays Blaine down gently before crawling over him, smirking up at him. "Oh God, you can't just do  _that_ ," Blaine whines, sitting up on his elbows. Before Cooper has a chance to get any smart-ass remark in edgewise, Blaine is reaching forward and pulling him close, pressing their lips together again. The kiss is messy, more frantic than their past ones, and is mostly teeth and tongues, but Cooper doesn't care. Instead, he makes quick work of Blaine's work shirt, as well as the wife-beater underneath it. Once Blaine's chest is bare, he finally pulls away, admiring the view.

"You're beautiful," He murmurs, staring down at Blaine. His hands are splayed out of Blaine chest, always touching him, like he'll disappear if he lets go for one second.

Blaine leans up again, pressing their foreheads together, "I love you, Cooper."

"I love you too," He breaths, leaning in to kiss him, but Blaine is pulling away to pull his shirt off as well. "You're  _sure_?" He asks again as Blaine lays back down. Cooper's lips are hovering right above his brother and if he wanted to, he could lean in and take what he wants, but he needs to know.

Blaine smiles, "More than sure. Please, Coop."

And at that, Cooper is diving in, lips pressing against Blaine's open and waiting ones.

It doesn't take long before Cooper's fingers are fumbling with the button on Blaine's jeans, and it doesn't take long before he's hooking his thumbs under the elastic waistband of his boxer-briefs, glancing up at him to be sure, one last time. When Blaine nods, Cooper pulls down. He's between Blaine's legs within seconds, licking and kissing and touching, and Blaine is writhing underneath him. "I'm going to make this so good for you," He murmurs, lips just barely brushing against Blaine's cock.

"Please..." He mutters out in response, "Coop..."

And by that point, Cooper can't help himself. He wants to be tentative, and he wants to go slow and make it teasing, and special, but if Blaine wants this as bad as he does - which happens to be a lot - he's sure he won't mind when Cooper decides to forego the teasing in favor for taking him all the way in, swallowing around his cock.

"Fuck, Cooper," Blaine groans, head falling back on the pillow. His fingers thread through Cooper's hair and he presses down just slightly, keeping him there for a moment before releasing and letting Cooper bob his head. He's pulling him off within a minute, though, earning a groan in protest from his older brother.

"Are you - did I-" Cooper immediately starts to ask, always concerned about what Blaine thinks.

"I want you to fuck me," Blaine just replies simply.

" _Oh_ ," Cooper breaths, "So I  _was_ doing something right."

Blaine laughs, nervous, "Yeah."

At that, Cooper's hands drop to his hips to undo his pants, and suddenly, Blaine is there. "Let me," He murmurs, looking up at him through dark lashes. And how could Cooper say no to that? He watches through half-lidded eyes as Blaine makes quick work of the button and fly and then he's pushing down and Cooper is lifting his hips so the offending fabric can be pulled away. And then he's naked, between Blaine's legs, and murmuring something about his bedside table and  _oh_ , there's suddenly lube in his hand.

Blaine shoots him a sly smile before lying down again, wiggling his hips slightly as if to get Cooper to take the hint. "If I hurt you…" Cooper warns.

"You won't," Blaine replies, smiling up at him.

"But if I do, you tell me," Cooper continues, leaning in to kiss Blaine's lips.

"Promise," Blaine whispers in response, and then Cooper's slick fingers are sliding down his body.

Blaine lets out a small whine when Cooper presses his first finger in, but when he goes to pull away, Blaine pushes his hips forward, sinking down. And  _fuck_ , that's hot. Cooper can't help but lean in at that, kissing and biting at Blaine's thighs as he works his finger in, until his brother is writhing underneath him, begging for another. Cooper obliges, pressing a second finger in, and it slides easily with the first.

He mouths at the side of Blaine's cock as he pumps his fingers, earning a slight groan from his brother and he can't help but smirk in response. He's going to make this  _so_  good for him. Within a few minutes – and the addition of a third finger – Blaine is a shuddering mess on the bed underneath Cooper, muttering out bits and pieces of encouragement and pleas which mostly end with " _fuck, Cooper more, please_."

Cooper lets his fingers slide out once he's sure that Blaine's ready, and begins slicking himself up in return. And then he's barely pressing into Blaine and kissing him, swallowing up the moan that Blaine makes when he thrusts inside. It takes all of his self control to push in slowly - his arms are shaking and his breath is heaving - and Cooper has to press his head to Blaine's shoulder and take a few deep breaths once he's completely sheathed, struggling to maintain composure. And then Blaine is kissing up Cooper's jaw and neck, leaving a wet trail in his wake, until his breath is ghosting over Cooper's ear and he's breathing out, " _Let go_ , Cooper."

Cooper's arms give out at Blaine's request, and then he's propped up only by his elbows and forearms.

" _Do it,_ " Blaine breaths, nibbling at his earlobe.

And that's all the encouragement that Cooper needs before his hips are snapping forward, hard into Blaine like they've been dying to do, and he's not quick enough with his mouth to swallow up the noise his brother lets out, but he's glad he doesn't.

It's over pretty quickly after that, (and Cooper tries hard not to be embarrassed about that) but it's hard to hold out with the noises that Blaine is making under him - little  _ooh's_ and  _ahh's_  - and the soft words of encouragement that he's whispering in his ear. And Cooper practically  _collapses_  on top of Blaine after they come, unable to bring himself to care about the sticky mess between their sweat-slicked bodies.

"I love you," Blaine breaths, his chest heaving with labored breaths. He presses a kiss to Cooper's shoulder, the only place that he can really kiss with the way that Cooper is laying on top of him. "I love you so much."

Cooper manages to sit up at that, to look down at his little brother - his sweaty forehead, flushed cheeks, messy hair - and smiles before leaning down to place a proper kiss on his lips. "I love you too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title is from "The Best Part" by Paul McDonald and Nikki Reed.  
> I hope you guys liked this. For some reason I dread writing porn, but I actually really liked writing this chapter.  
> More soon!


	5. I'll Surrender Up My Heart, And Swap It For Yours

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cooper struggles with telling Blaine about his deal, and discovers something about one of his closest friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _And it's so hard to say it but I've been here before  
>  Now I'll surrender up my heart  
> And swap it for yours_
> 
> _I'm out of touch, I'm out of love  
>  I'll pick you up when you're getting down  
> And out of all these things I've done I think I love you better now  
> I'm out of sight, I'm out of mind  
> I'll do it all for you in time  
> And out of all these things I've done I think I love you better now_

By September, things are great.

Cooper and Blaine have been together now for almost a year (about nine months to be exact) and things are going great for the two of them. Better than they could have imagined, actually. Blaine is starting his second semester in school and Anna introduces them to some of her friends that they haven't met yet, making a point of introducing Blaine as Cooper's boyfriend, not brother. Which of course, earns a little smile and nudge from Blaine. Blaine also moves into Cooper's room with him in mid February.

In fact, things are about as great as they could get. Cooper finally has Blaine, has a friend who accepts them for who they are, and is living with Blaine and said friend in California, doing what he loves.

Things are going great, except for that little nagging voice in the back of Cooper's head.

_Six years, Cooper. You're almost halfway through._

He tries not to think about it.

Tries.

Part of him thinks that he's going crazy. Demons don't exist. They can't. They're something from movies. They're not actually real. They can't be. Right?

The other part of him has no idea what to do. The other part of him has no idea if he should tell someone, or if it's even worth it. They'd think he's crazy anyway. Right?

Apparently, the second half of him wins, though. Because one night, Cooper realizes that he has someone who has never judged him or called him crazy, no matter what he does or says.

_Anna._

Blaine is back in Ohio for the weekend to watch the New Directions practice their set for sectionals. He begs Cooper to come with him, says it won't be the same without him, but Cooper has work, and Blaine understands. He ends up going home alone.

And it's Saturday night (exactly six years, now) when Cooper decides that he's going to tell Anna, and prays that she won't think he's insane.

"Alright, what the hell is bothering you?" She asks over pizza that night. They're sitting in the living room, an open box in front of them on the table and some action movie on TV. Cooper hasn't said anything in over thirty minutes, which is horribly out of character for Cooper, and Anna seems to notice. Thank God. He didn't want to be the first to say something.

"Really?" He asks, glancing at her.

She sighs, "Yes, really. You've been all smitten and constantly happy for months and now you just look bummed. What's going on?"

 _Smitten_?

He takes a deep breath, "You have to promise not to call me insane." When she looks at him like he  _is_  being crazy, however, he adds, "Or tell me I'm being stupid and insane. Either or."

She laughs, setting down her slice, "Okay. Shoot."

"It's been four years to the day that Blaine woke up today," He decides to open with.

Anna's eyes soften, "Oh..."

He clears his throat, "And Yeah, I know that's a good thing, but there's just something off about it. Something I've never told anyone." Anna cocks her head to the side in confusion, but doesn't say anything. She waits for him to go on, so he does. "Look, I know this is going to sound crazy, but just hear me out."

"Alright," She replies, throwing a reassuring smile his way.

"When Blaine was asleep," Cooper refuses to call it a coma, "He was out for a good three weeks. Everybody was kind of losing hope by then. _I_  was losing hope by then. And it was killing me because I felt like it was my fault. And there were so many things that he never got to do. He was only fifteen, for crying out loud..." He sighs, shaking his head, "Anyway, I ended up at the bar a lot, because I couldn't really handle just looking at him all day, like my parents would. And I met this girl."

Cooper takes a deep breath.  _Here goes nothing_.

"She told me that she could help. That... She could make Blaine better," He shakes his head, "Naturally, I thought she was crazy. But she knew... Everything. I don't... I know I sound crazy, but she said she could help..."

"Cooper..." Anna says, voice soft, but he keeps talking over her.

"She had these eyes. They were like these blood red eyes, and when she started talking about Blaine - about how I feel about Blaine - I started to believe her."

"Coop-"

"She said she could help me and I know it sounds crazy, but I took her up on it and then all of the sudden, Blaine was okay and-"

"How long did she give you?" Anna suddenly cuts in, and though Cooper didn't really hear her before, he definitely heard  _that._

"W-what?"

"How many years? Five? Ten?" She asks, eyes narrowing.

"Ten," Cooper replies carefully, "But how did you-"

And then suddenly, Anna's eyes are black.

On instinct, Cooper immediately scoots back on the couch, his drink crashing to the floor, "What the  _fuck_?"

And as fast as they're black, Anna is blinking and her eyes are back to normal, "Cooper-"

"What  _are_  you?" He breaths, almost ashamed in the way that he's cowering against the arm of the couch.

She looks down, avoiding his eyes for a moment, "You need to believe me when I say that I didn't know, okay?" Her eyes flick back up to him, "If I would have known, I never would have made myself a part of your life-"

"What are you?" He repeats, voice stern.

Anna lets out a deep breath, "A demon. I'm a demon."

Cooper is up and off the couch in a split second, grabbing the nearest weapon, which happens to be a fire poker, "Get out."

"Cooper, hear me out-"

" _Get the fuck out_ ," Cooper growls.

She stands from the couch, arms raised in defense, "Listen to me."

"Why?"

"Because I'm not like that other one. I'm your  _friend_ , Cooper."

Cooper chokes out a laugh, "Right."

She sighs, taking a step forward, "Cooper, I'm serious. Please just hear me out."

He raises his weapon, "Why should I do that?"

"Because you owe me that," She replies, "And because a fire poker isn't really your best defense against a demon, and because I could have killed you twenty times by now but I haven't."

Cooper glances down at the iron in his hands, then back up at her, "But-"

"Please," She begs, "Just sit down."

So he does.

"I'm not like that demon," She begins with, sitting down next to him again. When Cooper is silent, lips pursed in response, she continues. "You need to believe me when I say that I'm not out to hurt you, okay. I'm not...  _bad_ , for lack of a better word."

"Aren't all demons supposed to be  _bad_?" Cooper asks, "I mean, I'm a little new to this shit, but aren't you from..."

"Hell?" She supplies, "Yup."

"But..."

"Yeah, I fucked up. And I landed myself there," She says, reading Cooper's mind. "But not everyone in Hell is bad, Cooper."

"So then what landed you there?" He asks, unsure if he wants to know the truth or not.

She looks down at her hands, wringing them together, then glances back up at Cooper. "I made a deal."

"You... You made a-"

"Yeah," She cuts him off, "They gave me ten years."

"Like me," Cooper breaths.

"Like you," She repeats.

"What did you..." He trails off, "I mean, I don't know if it's overstepping, but why did you... You know?"

"My sister," She breaths.

"You... Really?"

Anna nods, "Cancer. She was dying, and it was killing me. It was tearing my family apart. I didn't... Ya'know, feel for her like you do with Blaine, but she was my  _sister_ , you know? The worst part was, we got in a fight a couple of years before my time was up. I tried mending things with her, but it never worked out. I died knowing that she still hated me. I don't even know if she went to my funeral."

"Jesus..." Cooper breaths, almost,  _almost_  forgetting that she's a  _demon_  sitting in front of him, not just a girl.

"I  _remember_ ," She says, looking at Cooper with pleading eyes, "I remember what it's like to be human. I'm not  _bad_ , Cooper. Please. Just... Give me a chance."

"How did you get out?" He asks, still trying to wrap his head around it. Trying to figure out if there's a way that  _he_ can escape his fate. If there's a way that he can get out.

She looks down, "I... I don't know. A door must have opened, or something, and I was one of the lucky ones."

"So a door opened, and..."

"And I found a vessel."

"A vessel," Cooper says numbly, "So you're..."

"Possessing someone?" She asks, lips turning up in a small smile. "Nah. I uh... I found a hospital. She..." Anna gestures at her body, "She was dying, and when she did, I took over. A Jane Doe. Nobody knew who she was. No family. Nobody looking for her."

"Right..." Cooper murmurs, looking her up and down.

"Like I said," Anna reaches forward to grab his hand, "I remember what it's like to be human, Cooper."

At that, Cooper's body visibly relaxes, as if he finally believes her. That, or he's just given up fighting.

"I don't know what to do," He finally murmurs.

"I know," She whispers in return, her hand suddenly rubbing his back softly.

"Did you ever tell anyone?"

"No," Her hand movement stops, "Nobody."

"Why?" Cooper asks, looking up.

Anna shrugs, "Why did you wait four years to tell someone?"

He sighs, understanding. "So what do I do?"

It's quiet for a long moment before she replies. "Live these next six years. Be happy. And be grateful that you have Blaine to share them with."

"Blaine..." Cooper groans, his head falling to his hands, "What am I supposed to tell Blaine?"

Anna's hand resumes its movement on his back, "I don't know. But when you decide, I'll be here for you."

And at that, Cooper glances up and smiles at her, "Thank you, Anna."

She smiles back.

...

Blaine comes back from Ohio, and Cooper holds off on telling him.

He can't. Not now. Not with the way that Blaine lights up when he sees Cooper waiting for him in the airport and practically flings himself into his arms. Not with the way that Blaine grabs his face and kisses him in front of God and everyone in the busy terminal. No. Telling him can wait.

Cooper can't spoil this. Not yet.

Instead, he just loves Blaine. And sometimes, if he's lucky, he even forgets about his deal. Blaine's smiling face and the way he kisses Cooper in the morning and the way he holds him close at night make him forget about it for a little while. Make him feel like nothing could touch them and their love. Nothing.

Before they know it, it's Christmas again, and instead of flying home, Cooper and Blaine celebrate in California with Anna. She stays, now that Cooper knows that she doesn't  _really_  have family out of state and that she actually spends her time away traveling.  _That_ breaks his heart, but he tries not to think about it. So does she.

" _Cooper_ ," Blaine murmurs, picking the guitar up from under the Christmas tree, "It's  _perfect._  But you shouldn't have."

Cooper shrugs, "Well, I did. You've been wanting to start playing again, and I figured that would help."

"He wanted to get you a piano instead, but I talked him down to that," Anna chimes in, grinning.

Blaine smiles back, "Well it's perfect. Thank you." He leans over, pressing a quick kiss on Cooper's lips. "Both of you," He adds, standing to hug Anna as well.

"I should also let you know that we may or may not have booked you a show at a little venue nearby, too," Anna says, grinning wider, "It's in a couple of weeks."

" _What_?" Blaine asks, eyes going wide, "But I don't - I  _can't_. I'm not ready. I-"

"You were a Warbler," Cooper says, smiling too, "I know better than anyone how good you are at impromptu performances."

And  _that_  earns a laugh out of Blaine.

He does wonderfully at his show, too. He even dedicates a song to Cooper.

"This one is for a very special someone in the crowd," Blaine says confidently into the microphone, smiling, "You know who you are."

And though it's beautiful and flattering - and  _God_  Blaine is perfect, how did Cooper get so lucky? - Cooper knows the song by the first few chords and his heart feels like its  _breaking_. He knows this song. Of course he knows this song. He and Blaine  _love_  this song, but he hasn't listened to it in forever, and now that he is, the lyrics hit him hard.

Anna grips his hand knowingly as Blaine sings out the lyrics.

_"And it's dark in a cold December, but I've got you to keep me warm._

_If you're broken I will mend you and I'll keep you sheltered from the storm that's raging on now..."_

And  _God,_  Cooper is in love with that boy. So horribly, helplessly in love.

And by the way that Blaine is looking back at him as he sings, Cooper knows that Blaine loves him too.

He closes his eyes and tries not to think of  _how relevant_ the lyrics are, when Blaine sings, " _Now I'll surrender up my heart, and swap it for yours_."

Anna grips his hand tighter, and it's in that moment that Cooper decides to tell Blaine. He deserves to know. He needs to know.

Cooper tries to come up with a million ways to tell Blaine. A million ways, and none of them seem good enough. Cooper can't bring himself to utter out any of them.

The easiest way he decided would be to tell Blaine that has some sort of disease - cancer or  _something_  - but that wouldn't work because he  _knows_  that Blaine would want to go to the hospital with him. He'd want to be there for him. And just that thought breaks Cooper's heart.

Cooper contemplates just telling him the truth.  _Hey Blaine, I made a deal with a demon to save your life and now I only have five years and seven months left to live._  But he decides against that one too. If, by some miracle, Blaine didn't think he was insane, he was bound to feel guilty. And Cooper can't live with that.

He comes up with plenty of other ideas - one of them including breaking it off with Blaine and saving him the guilt - but he can't do that. He's selfish and he loves Blaine and he can't do that. Nor can he break his heart like that and live with it for another five years. No.

He  _tries_ , he really does, but can't come up with anything. Anna even helps, bless her heart. But they can't come up with anything.

"Maybe it's just not the right time," Anna supplies one afternoon while they're out at lunch. Blaine is at school and they're in between jobs and are sitting at a little cafe that Anna found.

"Not the right time?" Cooper echoes.

She shrugs, "Yeah. I mean, why tell him now? Why ruin something good you've got going. I know that you think that he deserves to know, but if you think about it, wouldn't that make you  _both_  miserable for the next... what? Little over five years? Would you really be able to live with that?"

"Wow, when you put it like that..." Cooper mumbles sarcastically, rolling his eyes.

She sighs, "You know what I mean."

"I suppose," Cooper grumbles out.

"I'm just saying," Anna pushes, "You're miserable when you think about it. But when you don't - when you're with Blaine and happy and having a good time - you're on top of the world. If  _both_  of you knew, imagine how bad it would be."

"I guess."

"It's a  _need to know_  thing," Anna concludes, "And  _right now_ , Blaine doesn't need to know. You'll know when he does."

As if on cue, Cooper's phone buzzes and he grabs it and reads the text. It's from Blaine, of course.

_Almost out of class. Can't wait to see you. I love you._

Yeah. Maybe it can wait.

...

In fact, Cooper waits for over a year to tell Blaine. He means to sooner, he really does, but Blaine's birthday comes up and Cooper can't bear to tell him around then. Not with how excited Blaine is about turning twenty-one and being able to go to the bars with Cooper and Anna. So Cooper puts it off. They go out for Blaine's birthday, and Cooper carries a drunk Blaine into the bedroom that night. He can't help but smile at the way that Blaine holds on to him tight and babbles on about how much he loves him.

Then, Coachella comes around and Cooper bought tickets for Blaine  _months_  ago because he's always wanted to go, so he puts off telling him  _then,_ too. Because that just wouldn't be fair.

Somehow, the year speeds by, and before he knows it, they're celebrating Christmas and New Years again, and Cooper is shoving the thought,  _four years and eight months,_  to the back of his mind because he loves Blaine and he  _can't_  do that to him. Not yet.

And to Anna's defense, the more that Cooper just enjoys life and spends time with Blaine and their friends, he thinks about his deal less and less.

Until September. That's when it really hits him.

He's got four years left. Not five anymore. He's more than halfway through.

He wakes up one morning to Blaine's smiling face and leans in to place a kiss on his lips and he knows. He  _knows_  that he's going to have to tell him. And soon. He doesn't know what it is - if it's the way that Blaine takes his time kissing him, waking up, snuggling against him - but he knows that Blaine deserves to know. He deserves to be able to make the choice if he wants to stay with Cooper through it or not.

When Blaine mentions something about wanting to save their money and go traveling in the next couple of years, that pretty much does it for Cooper. He tells Blaine that they'll talk about it later, and Blaine heads off to work with a smile on his face.

"I've got to tell him, Anna," Cooper groans over breakfast.

"Why?" She's not disagreeing, she just wants to know.

"He mentioned traveling. Making plans. And the only thing I could think of is how I'm not going to be here to do that with him..." Cooper sighs, "He deserves to know before he starts making all of these plans for us."

Anna clenches her jaw. The thought of telling Blaine obviously worries her, but once again, she's not disagreeing. "When do you want to?" She finally asks.

Cooper takes a deep, shuddering breath, "Tonight."

At that, she reaches across the table to grab his hand, "I'll be here."

The rest of the day is a blur to Cooper. Part of him wants it to go by slowly, but the more he dreads it, the faster the day goes. He's done working around five, and he knows, as he's heading home, that Blaine is probably already there waiting for him. He sends Blaine a text around noon, letting him know that they need to talk about something when he gets home, and got  _"Alright. Is everything alright?"_  in response, which almost makes him tear up. He's dreading going home.

The only thing that makes it bearable is the fact that Anna will be there for him. To help him. Thank God.

He kisses Blaine like it's his last chance to do so when he gets home - deep and passionate and lingering - and as they pull apart, Blaine cocks his head to the side. "Hey..." He says softly, reaching out to touch Cooper's arms, "Is everything alright?"

Cooper takes a deep breath. Here goes nothing. He looks over his shoulder and Anna is sitting at the table, pretending to work on something, but she shoots him a reassuring look. "I need to tell you something," He finally says.

"Jesus, Coop," Blaine mutters, sitting down on the couch, "You can't just say shit like that. It worries me."

"I'm sorry," Cooper replies, sitting next to him.

"You're not  _cheating_  on me, are you?" Blaine manages to get out, face falling, and that breaks Cooper's heart because even though it's been  _years_  since his last awful break-up, he still assumes the worst.

Cooper shakes his head frantically, "No.  _God_  no."

"Oh. Okay," Blaine manages a smile at that, "Well, what's going on?"

Cooper takes a deep breath, looking down at his hands, "This is all going to sound really crazy, but you're going to have to believe me, okay?"


	6. Ain't Gonna Lose You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "What about my soul?" Blaine asks suddenly, trying to ignore the demon's comments.
> 
> He laughs, "What about it?"
> 
> "Mine for his," Blaine says, and he's shaking again, "I was supposed to die anyway, right? So can't you just right things? Take me and let him live."
> 
> "Jesus Christ," Curson mutters, shaking his head, "You boys are so ready to just sacrifice yourselves for one another. You're almost as bad as the Winchesters."
> 
> Blaine's sure that's a reference that he was supposed to catch, but he doesn't. Nor does he care. "Can you do it?"

"You're insane," Blaine says, smiling a little - unsure - as if Cooper and Anna are pulling some huge joke on him. They've been explaining things for the past thirty minutes - Anna even did the thing where her eyes turn black - and Blaine still refuses to believe them.

"I wish I was..." Cooper says quietly.

"No, this is crazy," Blaine says, standing and shaking his head, "You realize how crazy this sounds, right?"

Cooper stays put, nodding, "I know."

And now Blaine is shaking his head frantically, almost tearing up. "How do you expect me to believe that you... Sold your soul-" the words are hard for him to say, "-for crying out loud?"

He sighs, "I don't know. I guess I didn't really expect you to believe me. You just deserved to know..."

"Oh god," Blaine groans, his hands running through his hair. He's looking up at the ceiling now, trying not to cry, "It's true, isn't it?"

Anna nudges Cooper at that, mouthing the words go to him.

So he does.

Blaine resists at first, but eventually lets Cooper wrap his arms around him, and he practically collapses into his older brother's arms. "No," He sobs, clutching onto Cooper for dear life, "No, no. This isn't real. This... It can't be."

"Blaine..." Cooper coos softly, his hand coming up to stroke Blaine's hair, the other around his waist, holding him close.

"No," Blaine repeats, "You... You can't. Why?"

And Cooper pulls away a little at that so he can look Blaine in the eyes. "Really?" When Blaine nods, sniffling, Cooper takes a deep breath. "I did it because I was terrified of losing you, Blaine. Because you were fifteen for Christ's sake. You hadn't even lived yet. You didn't deserve it..."

Blaine shakes his head at that, pushing away from Cooper. "That's so fucking selfish, Coop."

"I know," He murmurs, watching as Blaine paces back and forth in the living room again.

"What am I supposed to do?" He shouts suddenly, turning on his heel so he's facing his brother. "Huh? What am I supposed to do when you're gone? Didn't you ever think about that? If you couldn't handle losing me how do you think I'm going to handle losing you?"

"I know, I know," Cooper says softly, taking a step toward Blaine, "But you have to believe me when I say that I didn't know that this was going to happen. I didn't know you felt the same way. If I had..." He swallows hard, "I wouldn't have put you through this."

"And even if I didn't feel the same?" Blaine asks, closing the gap between them and actually shoving at Cooper's chest, "If I didn't love you like I do, did you really think that losing you would hurt me any less? You're my brother, Cooper! How am I supposed to live with myself, knowing that you gave up everything for me?"

"I..." Cooper looks down. He can feel tears spilling from his eyes and he promised himself that he wouldn't cry, damn it. "I don't know, Blaine... I'm sorry..."

Blaine shoves at him again. "No. No, you don't get it do you?" When Cooper looks up at him, Blaine just shakes his head again, like he's disappointed. "I can't do this without you."

"You - We've still got four years," Cooper stutters out.

"Four years!" Blaine shouts, choking out a pained laugh, "You will be thirty-one, Cooper! You're not supposed to die that young. We're... We're supposed to travel. We're supposed to be together. Get old together."

"I know..." Cooper chokes out, his heart absolutely shatter at the fact that Blaine had planned on staying with him forever - on growing old together.

"No," Blaine's crossing the room again, opening up the closet and grabbing a jacket. He then makes his way to the bedroom and Cooper listens as he throws things around, and watches when he emerges with a backpack. He then throws on his shoes quickly before returning to Cooper. "You cant..." He chokes on his own breath and looks down, tears spilling from his eyes. His breath is coming out in quick, short bursts, "You can't do this, Cooper. You can't leave me."

"I'm sorry..." Cooper sobs out.

And at that, Blaine's hand is on his cheek, pulling his face up so he's looking him in the eyes. He leans forward, placing a chaste kiss on his lips and then he's gone. Cooper listens as he says something to Anna, then walks out the door, slamming it behind him.

Cooper collapses onto his knees the second the door shuts.

He's not sure how long he's like that - on the ground with his head in his hands, sobbing - until Anna is at his side, her hand on his back. "He'll be back," She says softly, "He loves you. He'll be back."

...

The flight to Ohio is fast.

He doesn't tell his parents that he's coming home. The last thing that he wants is for them to tell Cooper and have him knowing what he's up to. Because if Cooper knew he was in Ohio, he'd know exactly what he's trying to do. So, instead of staying with his parents, Blaine gets a hotel room on the outskirts of town and heads to the bar. The bar that Cooper told him about, specifically.

Even as he walks in, Blaine finds himself hoping that it's all some big joke. That Cooper didn't sell his soul and that they'll have a long, happy life together. No demons. He knows he's wrong, but he can hope, right?

And after two consecutive days of going to the same bar and not seeing this mysterious girl that Cooper told him about, Blaine even starts to believe that he is going crazy.

That is, until someone sits down next to him on the third day.

Blaine turns to his left and sighs when he sees that it's just a guy. He looks like he's in his mid twenties or so and he's wearing a leather jacket and a smirk on his face. Great. The last thing Blaine needed was some cocky asshole trying to hit on him or-

"Blaine Anderson," He coos, breaking the silence.

He glances to his left, "Excuse me?"

"You are little baby Anderson, right," The guy asks, still smirking.

Blaine narrows his eyes, "How did you-"

"Oh," The man's smile turns wicked at that and when he blinks, his eyes go red and Blaine's heart nearly stops. "I know everything."

"You're-" Blaine starts.

"Yes, I'm the one who gave your brother his deal. How is it, walking among the living again, anyway?" He sneers.

"Cooper said you were a girl," Blaine says numbly, instead of giving his question any kind of response.

"Oh. Her," He says, as if it's nothing. He waves his hand dismissively in the air, "I wore that vessel out a while ago. Figured I'd try something else on for size."

Blaine's eyes widen, "Wore it out?"

He shrugs, "Yeah, he name was Sarah, if I remember right. Who cares though, am I right? You didn't come here to talk about that."

"You killed her?" Blaine asks numbly.

"Uh. Yeah," He replies as if it's nothing, "It's kind of what I do, kiddo. Now I know you didn't come here to talk about some girl you've never met. You want to talk about Cooper."

"What's your name, then? Really?" Blaine asks, avoiding the topic of discussion again.

He sighs, "God, you're no fun. At least big brother would humor me." When that doesn't get a rise out of Blaine - he's trying really hard not to cause a scene - he sighs. "Names Curson. Nice to meet ya. Yeah, yeah. So can we get this show on the road, or what?"

"Why do you think I came here?" Blaine asks, trying to sip on his beer like he's not interested. His hand is shaking, though, and Curson notices it and smirks.

"To beg me not to kill your brother," He replies simply.

"And..." Blaine pushes, glancing up at him.

Curson chokes out a laugh, "That's your idea of begging?" When Blaine doesn't say anything in response, just stares at him, he sighs, "Sorry kiddo. Even if I wanted to save his life, I couldn't."

"And why's that?" Blaine manages to ask through gritted teeth.

"I just make the deals," He shrugs, "I don't enforce them. And before you ask, no, I'm not going to tell you who does. And no, Cooper can't be an exception."

"So then why did you even come talk to me?" Blaine growls, fists clenching at his sides.

"Are you kidding me?" He spits, "You looked pathetic. You've been here for the past three nights looking for me, so I figured I'd come say hi."

"What about my soul?" Blaine asks suddenly, trying to ignore the demon's comments.

He laughs, "What about it?"

"Mine for his," Blaine says, and he's shaking again, "I was supposed to die anyway, right? So can't you just right things? Take me and let him live."

"Jesus Christ," Curson mutters, shaking his head, "You boys are so ready to just sacrifice yourselves for one another. You're almost as bad as the Winchesters."

Blaine's sure that's a reference that he was supposed to catch, but he doesn't. Nor does he care. "Can you do it?"

He rolls his eyes. "Fucking Hell, kid. No. No, I can't. Once a deal's been made, there's no weaseling out of it. If he tries, you're dead. And no, you can't swap your soul for his. It's a one time offer."

"There's got to be something you can do..." Blaine whines, and okay, now he's begging.

"I said no," He growls out in return, "Now accept it and run along. You're causing a scene, and that's bad for business."

"But-" Blaine starts, only to be promptly cut off.

"No," Curson leans in close, "Now go, before I decide to kill him now, just for kicks."

And without thinking about it, Blaine is delivering a punch straight to his jaw, landing him on the floor. He's sure that it's not the smartest idea, that a demon could easily kill him, but he doesn't give him the chance. Instead, he's storming out of the bar with his fists clenched.

Blaine is back in California and walking into the house two days later. He spends one more day in Ohio, sitting in his hotel room, trying to sort things out in his head, and when he can't take it anymore - when he needs to see Cooper again - he decides to catch a plane back to California.

He doesn't expect Cooper to be home when he gets back - he's usually working on Mondays - but when Blaine opens the front door, he immediately catches sight of his older brother. And as much as he wants to close the door and pretend that he didn't just see him, he can't. Not with the way that Cooper looks up from his hands, expression drained of any hope whatsoever.

And though Blaine has spent the better half of a week trying to figure out what to say to Cooper, his mind is blank. Instead, he drops his bag, crosses the room, and envelops a now standing Cooper in a hug. He can't stop the tears that immediately start spilling from his eyes, and he buries his face into his brother's shoulder, hands gripping onto his shirt for dear life. And Cooper holds him too, one arm around his waist, the other cradling his head as he shushes him and murmurs out, "It's alright."

"I love you," Blaine sobs into his brother's shirt.

"I love you too," He chokes out in return.

It feels like a lifetime before they finally part, and when they do, Blaine realizes that his eyes aren't the only ones that are wet with tears. And that's when he realizes how hard the past five days must have been for Cooper, wondering where he was, if he was ever coming back...

"I'm so sorry..." Blaine murmurs, wiping his eyes, "I shouldn't have left."

"It's okay," Cooper replies simply, and God, he can never be angry with Blaine.

"I just... I needed to figure shit out on my own," He tries to explain.

"It's a lot to take in," Is Cooper's numb response.

"You know you have me, right?" Blaine asks suddenly, reaching forward to grab one of Cooper's hands. "I'm not abandoning you. We'll figure this out, okay? There's got to be a way, and we'll figure it out. Together." A few fresh tears find their way down Cooper's cheek, and Blaine reaches up to wipe them away, smiling reassuringly at his older brother. And for once, he feels like the older one. He feels like he's the one taking care of Cooper. "Okay?"

Cooper nods, "Okay."

Blaine leans up on his toes at that, pressing his lips against Coopers. The kiss is slow and desperate and Coopers lips taste like salty tears. "I love you," He murmurs against Cooper's lips, "I love you so much."

...

"Anna is out, trying to gather some information," Cooper explains the next day when Blaine asks where she is. "She said she knows a few people who might be able to help. She just has to find them first."

"Who?" Blaine asks, looking up from his lunch.

Cooper shrugs, "Some brothers. Apparently they hunt... Demons and stuff."

"And stuff," Blaine snorts.

"I'm in the dark here, too," Cooper says, sitting down at the table, "But Anna seems to know a lot. And I trust her."

"Even though she's a demon..." Blaine says, looking up.

"Even though she's a demon," Cooper confirms, "Which is still weird to say, but yeah. I trust her. She was my friend first."

"Right," Blaine retorts, and Cooper can tell that he doesn't really buy it.

"She's the only person out here who knows that we're brothers, Blaine," Cooper says softly, "She's the only person who doesn't care that we're brothers. She-"

"Is not a person," Blaine fills in.

"No," Cooper agrees, "She's not. But she's my friend. And she hasn't let me down yet." And then the conversation is over.

...

Anna doesn't return for a few weeks. She calls Cooper every couple of days to keep him updated, but it takes her the better half of a month to make it back home. And when she does, they're still right where they were at the beginning.

"I couldn't find them..." She says quietly, "I followed every lead. I asked everyone I know, and I couldn't find them anywhere. It's like they're hiding."

Cooper smiles at her sadly when she tells him, and steps forward, wrapping her in a hug, "It's okay."

And it's really not okay. Cooper's got three years and eleven months now, but he kind of knew that things weren't going to be okay from the get go. Since that first day - since the day that Blaine woke up - Cooper sort of knew that there wasn't a happy ending. By the look in Anna's eyes when he pulls away, she knows it too.

The only person who doesn't know it (or doesn't believe it) is Blaine.

And Blaine spends months searching.

During the first month or two, Cooper almost feels like Blaine is ignoring him. He goes to work or school and when he comes back, he immediately gets on the computer and begins doing research or drills Anna about things he needs to know about demons. Once he's done, it's almost midnight. Cooper is usually already lying in bed, watching TV or on his phone, and Blaine will climb in behind him, wrap his arm around his waist, and if Cooper's lucky, he'll place a quick kiss on the back of his neck before falling asleep.

By December, Cooper puts an end to it.

Blaine comes home one day and his computer is missing. Anna is also conveniently nowhere to be found, and even his notebook is gone. "Cooper!" He calls, making his way into the bedroom, where there's light filtering from under the door, "Have you seen my-"

Blaine is cut off, though, when he sees Cooper, laying in bed, laptop by his side and notebook in his hands. He breaths out a small little "oh" before stepping into the room and closing the door behind himself.

"How do you kill a demon?" Cooper asks, breaking the silence.

"Well you don't... You don't kill a demon," Blaine corrects, "I mean, Anna said that she's seen a knife that can do it, but she doesn't have one. You can just send them back to Hell, basically."

"And to trap them? Keep them away?" Cooper asks.

"Salt. Devil's traps. Holy water," Blaine rattles off, "But Coop, you even said, if you try to get out of it, they'll kill..." He cuts himself off, "It's not a demon that's going to come for you, anyway. It's Hell Hounds. Those are much different."

"I know," Cooper breaths.

"You-"

"I know," He repeats, "What do you think I did for six years? And after I told Anna?"

Blaine cocks his head to the side, "Then why are you asking me?"

"Because you have this memorized, Blaine," Cooper snaps, tossing the notebook aside, "You've been staring at this stuff for months now, and we're not any better off than when you started."

"I'm sorry," Blaine mutters, looking down, "I just need more time. I-"

He's cut off, when Cooper is suddenly off of the bed and standing in front of him, cupping his head in his hands and tilting it up to look at him. "No," He says softly, "You don't need more time. You need to stop."

Blaine's eyes widen, "What?"

"You're killing yourself every day, looking for an answer. You've been at this for months now, Blaine," Cooper sighs, "I hate thinking about it, but my clock is running out. I'd like to be able to spend my time with you. Not alone, with you hunched over a laptop."

Blaine's eyes immediately gloss over with tears, "Oh my god, Cooper. I didnt - I'm so sorry. I didn't realize..."

"It's okay," Cooper breaths, smiling down at his little brother, "I know, you just want to help. But you can help by putting on some clean clothes and going on a date with me tonight. Alright?"

Blaine smiles and nods quickly, "Alright."

"Thank you," Cooper says softly, leaning down to kiss him quickly, "Now get ready. I'm starving."

At that, Blaine immediately starts unbuttoning his work shirt and heading over his dresser to grab a clean one, but stops in the middle and turns back to Cooper. "We're not giving up, though, are we?" He asks, and the look in his face is so desperate that Cooper can't bring himself to answer that question honestly.

Instead, he smiles. "No. Of course not."

But the truth is, he already has.

Cooper manages to keep Blaine busy for months, going on dates - to the movies, dinner, the beach - and it works. For a while. But when they have down time, when Cooper is working on a new little guest role for a TV show or when he's still asleep in the morning, Blaine keeps working. Keeps doing research. Keeps trying to find an answer.

"Here," Anna says one day in August (and it's almost been a year since he told Blaine), handing Cooper an envelope. Blaine's been working harder recently and they've both noticed. It's been stressing Cooper out, which in turn, upsets Anna. When he opens it, he sees a stack of one-hundred dollar bills, crisp and neat and Jesus he can't even tell how many there are right away. There's a lot, that he knows.

"What is this?" He whispers harshly, even though Blaine is in the shower.

"Spending money," She replies, shrugging, "Take him somewhere. Get his mind off of things."

"Spending money?" Cooper asks, "This isn't spending money. This is like... a small fortune. Where did you get this?"

Anna smirks, "I have my ways. But seriously, take him somewhere. You both deserve it."

"And what are you going to do?" Cooper asks, eyes narrowing.

"I have a few people I need to go see," She shrugs again.

He sighs, "I thought we agreed that we were done trying to save me unless you found those friends of yours."

"I'm not trying to save you," She corrects, "I'm trying to find a way to get you back, once you're gone."

Cooper raises his eyebrows, "You what?"

"It's not a for sure thing," Anna says quickly when the water shuts off, "But it's an option." And then she's kissing Cooper on the cheek, grabbing her duffel bag, and heading out the door.

"New York?" Blaine asks, when Cooper brings up the idea of a trip later that day.

"Yeah," He replies, shrugging, "Why not?"

"Well first off, we don't have the money..."

"I've been saving," Cooper says quickly, deciding not to tell Blaine about Anna's generous gift.

"You hate New York," Blaine retorts.

"But you love New York. And I love you," Cooper counters smoothly, earning a small smile from Blaine before he speaks again.

"I haven't been there since..." He trails off.

And though the thought of Kurt pains Cooper (it always will) he smiles. "Well, we're not going there to see him. We're going there to have fun."

"What about work? And school?" Blaine asks, looking for another reason not to go.

Cooper shrugs, "Tell them it's a family emergency. I don't have anything going on right now."

"But-"

"Please," Cooper begs and he almost adds puppy eyes and 'for me' but decides against it. Either way, Blaine says yes.

...

They go to New York for a week. It's wonderful and romantic and perfect and it gets Blaine's mind off of things for a couple of months. And when he starts doing research again, Cooper checks his money and offers a trip to Hawaii. He lies, says something about graduation money that he never spent, and soon, Anna is waving the brothers off as they board a plane.

They stay there for two weeks. Anna somehow has their room upgraded to a honeymoon suite while they're on the plane (damn, she's good) and Cooper can't help but love the way that Blaine's jaw drops when they walk in the room.

"I love it," He murmurs.

"I love you," Cooper replies, and yeah it's cheesy, but it doesn't stop Blaine from practically sprinting across the room and jumping into his arms and kissing him.

"This is Heaven," Cooper breaths later as they're lying in bed, sheet covering their naked torsos and sun setting outside of their window.

"I never want to leave," Blaine says in agreement.

"I wish we didn't have to."

Blaine rolls so that his head is pressed against Cooper's chest, listening carefully to the steady beat of his heart. He wants to say something along the lines of I'm going to miss this, but he doesn't want to ruin the moment, so he just lays there quietly, fingers intertwined with Cooper's, watching the sun set.

Cooper is thinking the same thing and he can't help but realize that over a year has passed now, since he told Blaine about everything. It's December, and he only has two years and nine months left, but he tries not to think about it. Tries not to ruin their perfect moment.

He leans down to place a kiss on Blaine's forehead, which causes him to look up and smile at Cooper and God, he's perfect. Cooper locks that image - that memory - away, in hope that he won't lose it once he's... gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title is from "Ain't Gonna Lose You" by Brett Dennen.


	7. Now That I've Found You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ten years pass by fast when you're trying not to waste them...

When you're in high school, middle school, college,  _whatever_ , four years seem to go by slowly. And once you're out, it seems like it's a lot of time behind you, a lot of time wasted. It feels like it dragged on forever.

Hell, even working for four  _hours_ seems to drag on forever, whereas watching a couple of movies with some friends seems to go by in an instant. Maybe the saying  _time flies when you're having fun_  is true. To an extent.

The funny thing is, time seems to go by the fastest when you're trying  _not_ to waste it.

Cooper always felt like high school was the longest, most pointless four years of his life. And once he was out, time seemed to fly by.

The  _past_  four years, however, couldn't have gone by faster.

Hell, the past  _ten_  years couldn't have gone by faster.

It feels like just yesterday, that Cooper was giving Blaine a quick hug, telling him that he'd be back from California soon, and wishing him luck with his date, and telling him to have fun at the dance. It feels like just yesterday that Cooper got that phone call from their mom, telling him that Blaine had gotten in an accident. That he was in the hospital.

It feels like just yesterday, that Cooper saw  _hope_  of all things in that mysterious girl's red eyes, and it feels like just yesterday that Blaine woke up.

But it's been almost ten years now. In about a week, it  _will_  be ten years, and it feels like it's gone by in the blink of an eye.

...

Blaine has a show on Saturday. When Cooper first books it, Blaine begs him to cancel it - tells him that he won't be able to do it, that he won't be able to perform, knowing they only have one week left - but Cooper refuses. In the end, he tells Blaine that he wants to see him perform, wants to watch him sing, once more before he's gone. And  _God_  that conversation ends in ugly tears and Blaine begging Anna to find some way to save him. She doesn't, however. They all promised, when Cooper only had a year left, that they'd stop looking. That they'd accept it.

So Blaine plays his show on Saturday. He plays his show on Saturday, and he calls Cooper up on stage for his last song. Cooper shakes his head at first, but Blaine insists, even getting the crowd to chant his name a little. "You know the song, Coop," Blaine says, smiling, "I know you do. Come on.  _Sing with me_." And Cooper would be lying if he said he'd ever been able to resist those puppy eyes.

So he walks onto the stage and Blaine starts the song and Cooper heart swells. "You're singing the girl part," Blaine says softly in his ear, just out of reach of the microphone. Cooper goes to say something sarcastic in response, along the lines of ' _what are you trying to say about me_?' but doesn't, because then Blaine is starting to sing. And Cooper is always in awe at his voice.

_"I hope these days go on forever,  
_ _And I'm always right by your side,  
_ _You're all I want to know  
_ _For the rest of my life._

_I can't help what time is done,_ _  
_ _And how long I had to wait_ _  
_ _Now I found your hand in mine_ _  
_ _I hope I didn't come too late_ _  
_ _There's no beauty like your face in the morning light."_ __  


And before he knows it, the chorus is kicking in and Cooper is singing too, his voice blending with Blaine's.

" _And all my life I have been so scared  
_ _And I never knew I never wanted you there  
_ _I've been broke, been bust, been snared  
_ _So love lost and under prepared, baby  
_ _But now that I found you, now that I've got you  
_ _I've got everything, my dear_

_You mean everything to me, my dear."  
_

And Cooper doesn't care if people at the venue are staring, if the song is too intimate, or if his gaze is lingering on Blaine for too long, because he can't keep his eyes off of his brother as he sings along with the most honest lyrics he's ever sang in his entire life.

Before he knows it the song is over, fading out with Blaine's guitar, and it's quiet for a long moment before the audience bursts into applause and Blaine is smiling and thanking them.

...

"I love you," Cooper breaths against Blaine's neck that night when they're in bed. "I don't think I could ever begin to explain to you how much I love you."

"You don't have to," Blaine whispers back, leaning up to kiss him, "I know."

They spend that entire night up, talking, kissing, and being together. And if Cooper could physically stay up for an entire week straight, he'd do it, just so he doesn't have to miss a moment of Blaine.

...

As much as they don't want to sort out the details - the specifics - Cooper and Blaine, with Anna's help, nail down Cooper's last details toward the end of his week. He's got three days left, and he's gripping Blaine's hand tight under the table as they figure out exactly what Blaine is going to say to their parents.

"I can't tell them," Blaine finally says, after almost an hour of discussing it. They've talked about it before, at the beginning of the year, about what Blaine would say to their mom and dad.

But three days before, Blaine backs out.

"I'm  _not_  telling them," He repeats, after it's been silent for a long moment, "I'll tell them you're on a trip or something. I just... I can't tell them. I  _can't_." And Blaine expects arguing. He expects Cooper to tell him that it's something he  _has_  to do, but instead, Cooper just hugs him, muttering out something along the lines of ' _You don't have to. It's okay_.'

...

Cooper writes letters for both Blaine and Anna two days before his time is up. He pulls them out of his pocket that night and hands them to her. Blaine is asleep next to him on the couch and Cooper is stroking his hair softly with his free hand, trying not to wake him. "You don't have to read it now," Cooper says softly, looking down at Blaine, "But give his to him after I'm gone, okay?"

She nods sadly, "Okay."

"Take good care of him, Anna."

And then her hand is on Cooper's and she's smiling this sad smile, "You know I will." And he smiles back in return, trying not to get choked up. Trying to stay strong.

"So it's at midnight?" Cooper asks, breaking the awkward silence.

"Yeah," She replies, "Or it was for me."

He nods, "It's going to hurt."

It's not a question, but Anna replies. "Yeah. A lot."

"You're going to need to gag me. Or something. The last thing I want is for the cops to show up. I can't leave Blaine to deal with that."

She nods, "I know."

"And you  _will_ be there for him, right?" He asks, looking down at him.

"Of course," Anna replies, smiling fondly, "I wouldn't dream of leaving him alone."

At that, Cooper smiles softly back, "Thank you, Anna. For everything."

...

"It's okay, Blaine," Cooper murmurs two days later, kissing at his brothers lips between wiping his tears away, "It's okay, you'll be okay."

"Coop, I  _can't_ ," Blaine whimpers, hands gripping onto the back of his shirt for dear life.

Cooper just rubs his back in response, taking a moment to glance at the clock when Blaine buries his head into his shoulder. He's got about an hour left. "Shhh..." He coos, "You're alright. You're strong, and you're brave, and you'll be alright, Blaine. I know you will."

"You can't go," Blaine sobs into his shirt, "You  _can't_. I can't  _live_  without you."

"Yes you can," Cooper replies softly, "And you will, okay?" At that, he grabs Blaine by the shoulders and pulls away so he can look at him. He wipes away at fresh tears on his brother's face with his thumbs before pressing another wet kiss on his lips. "You need to do this. For me, okay?"

Blaine nods, even though his eyes are shut and more tears are spilling down his face again. "I - I love you," He chokes out.

"I love you too," Cooper responds, leaning forward to press their foreheads together, "More than you could ever imagine."

"Coop..." Blaine sobs, and then he's clutching at his brother's shirt again.

"Be happy," Cooper replies, though he can feel tears pricking at his own eyes now, "For me. Live a good life, okay? You've got so much talent, Blaine. Don't waste it, just because I'm gone."

"I won't," Blaine chokes out, "I promise."

It's quiet between them then. Cooper can hear the seconds ticking by on the clock as he holds Blaine close, and he glances over his shoulder at Anna, who is wiping her own tears off of her face. He shoots a reassuring smile her way, and she returns it. And then it's silent.

It's silent as the clock reaches ten till midnight, and it's silent, save for Blaine's quiet crying, when Cooper hears the first howl.

He shoots Anna a look, and by the expression on her face, she heard it too. Blaine however, keeps clutching at Cooper.

By 11:55, they're closer. It sounds like they're circling the house, growling and barking. Hungry. Cooper gulps and presses a kiss to Blaine's temple.

11:58, and he can hear scratching at the door.

"B," He says softly, pulling away slightly to look at his brother, "It's time."

Anna rummages for something in the kitchen, most likely the bandanna that Cooper had hoped would suffice as a gag.

" _No,_ " Blaine sobs, still holding tight onto Cooper's shirt like a small child with their mother, "No, no, no. Cooper..."

"Shhh..." Cooper soothes, littering kisses over Blaine's lips. "I love you," He says, holding Blaine's face between his face, "With all my heart, I love you."

"I love you, Coop," Blaine manages to reply between sharp, panicked breaths.

"It's time," Anna says softly, reluctant to break the two of them apart. But Cooper nods, standing. Blaine grips his hand and stands as well, fingers lacing together.

"I'll see you again," Cooper says softly to Blaine, before placing a kiss on his forehead, and then Anna is tying the bandanna around his mouth.

Midnight hits, and the front door flys open.

...

It takes a week for Blaine to muster the courage to read Cooper's letter. In between crying and passing out and Anna trying to force him to eat, he stares at the envelope on his dresser, but he doesn't read it. Not right away. He can't. He can't because once he does, it makes things real. It makes them permanent. Cooper is really gone.

Finally, though, a week goes by – a week of sobbing and feeling like death and  _burying_  his brother despite Anna saying she could do it on her own – and he opens the envelope with trembling hands.

" _Blaine,_

_I know this is hard for you. It's hard for me too._

_All I've ever wanted is the best for you. All I've ever wanted is for you to live a full and happy life. And you can do that, now. I don't want you to feel guilty knowing that I did this for you. I did it because I love you, and because you deserve the world._

_Above everything else, I'm grateful that I got to spend the past five years loving you like I've always wanted to. You're all I've ever wanted. You're the best brother, and the best lover, I could ever ask for._

_I know it's going to be hard for you, and for that, I'm sorry. I wish I knew how to make it easier._

_Anna will be there, though. In fact, she's probably sitting outside of your room as you read this to make sure that you're alright. I know you didn't always trust her, but she's there for you. If you need anything, you go to her, okay?_

_There's some money in the top drawer of my dresser. It's everything I've been saving up. Use it. Quit your job, and use it. Go travel. Go do all of the things you always wanted to do. Live your life. For me._

_Be happy for the time that we had together._

_I will see you again, little brother. I promise._

_'I will not say do not weep, for not all tears are evil.'  
\- I figured a Tolkein quote would cheer you up._

_In fact, go watch Lord of the Rings. Those movies always cheer you up._

_I love you Blaine, with all of my heart._

_-Cooper"_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chapter title and the song Cooper and Blaine sing in this chapter is "Now That I've Found You" by Paul McDonald (feat. Nikki Reed)
> 
> Also, This isn't the end! There's still two more chapters, promise!


	8. I'm Not Going To Ever Get Over You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _But you went away  
>  How dare you?  
> I miss you  
> They say I'll be okay  
> But I'm not going to ever get over you_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title is from "Over You" by Miranda Lambert.  
> Also, I apologize for the little Supernatural crossover bit in this chapter. I just had to do it, though. Couldn't resist. :]  
> One more chapter left, guys!

Blaine wouldn't say he ever really got over Cooper. Of course not. You don't just get over the love of your life. You don't. And he wouldn't say that things get easier over time, because they don't. Even almost a year after Cooper's death, and Blaine still aches for him. He still wakes up in the middle of the night from nightmares filled with his brother's muffled screams and invisible claws ripping through his clothes. He still rolls over in his bed in the morning, disappointed when he opens his eyes and the other half of the bed is empty.

For the first couple of months, he doesn't even want to get out of bed. In fact, he only really leaves the house when Anna convinces him to go to the doctor after a couple of weeks because he looks like death. And yes, Anna is still there. Of course she is. She doesn't say much to Blaine because  _what do you even say?_  So instead, she buries herself in research while making sure that Blaine is still… well, alive.

She watches out for him too, like she promised Cooper. When Blaine doesn't go to work for a couple of days, she forges a note from the doctor, saying that Blaine is sick. Very sick. Or at least sick enough to miss a couple month's worth of work. Because when he's finally ready, she wants him to have something to do, even if money isn't an issue.

Blaine doesn't go home for Christmas, no matter how much his parents beg him to. And he doesn't tell them about Cooper. He can't. Not yet. He tells them that he's on a trip, that he hasn't heard from him in a while either. And while that upsets his parents, it's better than the truth.

"You're going to have to tell them eventually," Anna says softly one day.

"Like I said," Blaine grumbles, "I'll give it a year. If we don't figure something out in a year, I'll tell them."

She places a comforting hand on his shoulder and smiles a sad smile and then that's the end of it.

Eventually, Blaine does get out of bed. It's shortly after the first of the year and he's been reading Cooper's letter over and over to himself for days, looking for an answer. Trying to figure out what to do. It isn't until the third day that he realizes that Cooper would be disappointed in him for acting the way he has been. So he gets up the next day, calls his work, and tells them that he's feeling better. Because that's what Cooper would want.

He doesn't stop searching, though. And he knows that Anna doesn't, either. By the time they hit the six month mark, Anna is on her phone more often than not when Blaine gets home from work. She's been calling all of her contacts lately, trying to locate the brothers that she had been talking about years ago. Apparently, she says, if anyone can fix this, they can.

Blaine tries to believe, he tries to stay hopeful, but once they're at the eight month mark, it's hard. Anna leaves in mid June. "You're sure you're going to be okay?" She asks Blaine, even as she's halfway to the door, bag in hands.

He nods, "Yeah. I'll be alright."

She takes a deep breath, "Alight. Well, you remember everything I taught you?"

"I do," Blaine says confidently, thinking about the salt that usually lines their doorways and the holy water that's conveniently placed next to the front door, just in case.

"Call me if anything happens. Or if you see anything strange. Okay?"

"I will," He says shortly.

She nods. "Alright. Well I guess this is it."

"It is," Blaine says softly.

And then Anna is suddenly pulling Blaine into a tight hug, muttering out, "Take care of yourself," against his hair.

...

Blaine doesn't hear from her at all. June ends and July passes by, and nothing out of the ordinary happens. Blaine goes to work and comes home and does some research and goes to bed. By August, he even plays a couple of gigs at the venue Cooper had taken him to. It's painful to go there again, thinking back on the last time he was there, but he reminds himself that it's what Cooper would want.

And toward the middle of August, Blaine starts to get nervous. It's almost been a year since Cooper's death and he promised himself that if they hadn't found a way to get him back after a year, that he'd tell his parents.

He calls Anna one night, about a month till the anniversary of his brother's death, to talk to her about it. It's not that anything weird has happened, or that he's scared, it's just that he needs a friend to talk to. And she's about the closest thing to that he has left.

She doesn't answer.

It's in that moment that Blaine realizes that he's completely and hopelessly on his own.

...

Somewhere, in an open field in middle-of-nowhere California, a pair of blue eyes open.

...

When Cooper takes his first breath, he's halfway out of a hole in the ground. It takes a moment for that fact to really hit him, but when it does, he's grabbing at dirt with his short nails and pulling with all of his might to get his lower body out and into the sunlight.

His body aches. Every muscle feels like it hasn't been used in months. When he breathes, his throat is dry and scratchy and his entire body moves with it, as if it's been searching for oxygen for a long time.

It takes a moment for his vision to focus, but when it does, he attempts to take in his surroundings.

He's in the middle of nowhere - there's brown dirt and rocks, littered with weeds and dry grass for as far as the eye can see. In front of him, about fifty yards away, is a paved road, which looks unkept. And when he turns, Cooper sees the makeshift cross behind him. And at the base of it, some roses, which can't be more than two days old.

It looks eerily like a grave.

Which would make sense, because the last thing that Cooper remembers is growling, and claws and searing pain and…  _Blaine._

He tries to stand, but immediately collapses to the ground, legs weak from neglect. It takes him a few tries before he's walking wobbly down the slight decline and toward the road, wishing that he had some water or something, because his throat is dry and sticky and he feels like he's going to collapse at any second.

He walks.

He's not sure for how long, but he walks.

The first thing he does, once he hits the road, is check his pockets for his cell phone. When it's nowhere to be found, he keeps walking.

Almost half an hour goes by - the sun is starting to set now - and he's still walking alongside the road. He hadn't been expecting to see a car - the road had looked old and deserted - but he had let himself hope. After thirty minutes, he starts to realize that he might have to walk to the nearest town, which worries him, because he has no idea where he is.

So that's why Cooper's head perks up when he hears the sound of an engine off in the distance. And when he turns and looks in the opposite direction, he can barely make out the shape of a car heading in his direction.

The car - some black muscle car - slows as it nears him, and it's in that moment that Cooper begins to worry. He's on the side of the road, in the middle of nowhere, with no money, no phone and no weapon. What if these people are dangerous?

He doesn't have much time to think about that, though, because then the car is rolling up next to him slowly and the driver's side window is rolling down. "Hey," a man calls out to him, and Cooper turns to look at him - to determine if he's safe or not. He's got short light brown hair and is wearing an old, worn out looking flannel shirt and leather jacket. There's another guy sitting silently next to him and a third in the back seat, as well. "You need a ride?" The first one asks, after Cooper just stares for a moment.

He shakes his head no. As much as he doesn't want to keep walking for who knows how long, he also doesn't want to be overpowered and left for dead by three guys he doesn't know. Who - for all he knows - could be demons, anyway. He keeps walking, but the car stays in pace with him.

"Tell him, Dean," Cooper hears the man in the passenger seat say softly, and the first guy sighs.

"Anna sent us," He calls, keeping up with Cooper, and slamming on the breaks when Cooper promptly stops walking.

"What?" Cooper manages to bite out, turning and looking at the car. His voice comes out all scratchy and dirty and it feels like it hasn't been used in months.

The man in the car sighs, "We're her friends. She sent us to get you."

"Where is she?" Cooper manages before throwing himself into a coughing fit.

"Get in the car," Is the only response he gets, and Cooper decides that it's his only choice, before opening up the back door. He looks down at himself, suddenly realizing that he's covered in dirt - it's all over his clothes and skin and under his nails and probably in his hair - and he looks hesitantly at the man in the back seat.

He just smiles under Cooper's gaze, "You're fine. Don't worry about it."

So Cooper finds himself climbing into the back seat of the car and settling down next to the man with the long hair.

"Here," The driver grabs a water bottle from the passenger and hands it back to Cooper, "I'm sure you need this pretty bad right now." Cooper takes the water, but looks at it hesitantly before the man speaks up again. "It's just water," He says, even smiling a little, "We're here to help, alright?"

"Right," Cooper says roughly, opening the bottle and downing two thirds of it in a few big gulps.

"I'm Dean," The man driving says after a long moment of silence between the four of them. Cooper is still on edge, worried that this is some kind of trap, but then the driver -  _Dean_  - flashes him a nervous, unsure smile in the mirror, and he tries to come to terms with the fact that maybe someone's looking out for him. That  _maybe_  these are good guys, who are just here to help him. "This is Cas," Dean continues, nudging at the passenger, "And that's Sam."

Cooper nods at the man sitting next to him. "Cooper," He says tentatively, though he's sure that they know very well who he is already. Especially if Anna sent them.

_Anna._

"Where  _is_  Anna?" He asks after a moment, and receives silence in return.

Dean clears his throat after a long moment, "It's uh... It's kind of a long story. Sammy?"

And Sam, the guy that Cooper is sharing the back seat with, shuffles some things around on the floor before pulling an envelope out of backpack. "Here," He says, smiling this little half smile that almost screams  _I'm sorry_ , "You should read that... When you get home."

"Speaking of  _home_ ," Dean interjects, "Where to, kid?"

Cooper wants to tell him that he's  _not_  a kid - that they can't be more than five years, if even that apart in age - but he keeps that to himself. Instead, he gives Dean directions to his house, all while staring down at the envelope with  _his_  name on it.

...

"What happened?" He finally says after a good thirty minutes of driving. The sun has gone down and from what Cooper has gathered, they've still got a little bit of driving in front of them before they reach LA. He's been trying not to think about the letter and  _where Anna could be_  and  _Blaine_  and why these strangers had to pick him up, but he can't help it. Not when he thinks about the fact that he practically came-to halfway out of what looked like a grave in the middle of nowhere.

It's silent in the car. Sam is looking down at his hands, lips pursed, and Dean is glancing at the passenger, Cas, who still has yet to say one word. Finally, Dean sighs. "What do you remember?"

"I..." Cooper closes his eyes, takes a deep, shuddering breath, and thinks. "Howling. And pain. And my..." His voice catches in his throat. He's been trying not to think about Blaine, but the image of his little brother - his blood splattered, tear streaked face - is burned into his brain. "My brother."

He sees Dean visibly swallow and watches as he and Sam share a glance in the mirror. "We should probably get you some food, kid. You hungry?"

Cooper wants to argue. He wants to demand to know what happened, but then his stomach is growling -  _aching_  - and he figures he could use food, even if all he wants more than anything is to get home to Blaine.

They end up stopping at a little diner in the next little town they come across. It's practically deserted - there's only three other cars in the parking lot - and Cooper quickly learns that two of them belong to employees. The third belongs to an old couple sitting at a booth. They find a space to sit and order - Cooper probably gets too much food, but he doesn't care - and then he's looking across the table at Dean.

"Dean..." He says after a long moment. The waitress interrupts, bringing them their drinks, and then he turns his attention back to the man across from him again. "What happened?" He asks again, "I need to know."

And part of Cooper already knows the answer. Part of him knew from the second he opened his eyes, from the second he saw the cross and the flowers and the  _grave_. But he needs to hear it.

"You died," He finally manages, and Cas closes his eyes, as if he wished Dean hadn't said it. "You uh... You were in Hell."

Cooper's throat suddenly feels dry again, despite the water  _and_  lemonade sitting in front of him. "How long?"

"Kid..." Dean says, his tone warning.

"I'm not a kid," Cooper finally says, though his voice sounds small, "I can handle it. How long was I  _dead_?"

"Almost a year," Dean says, voice low, "A little over eleven months."

Cooper swallows hard, "And how am I... I mean, I  _am_  alive, right?"

Dean glances at Cas, who finally clears his throat under his gaze. "You're alive," He says.

"But I was in  _Hell_ ," Cooper says, mouth dry.

"And we pulled you out," Cas says, matter-of-factly.

"And how did you do that?" Cooper says, suddenly panicking, "There's got to be some downside here. The... The  _demon_  said that if I backed out, Blaine would die." And Cooper watches as Sam and Dean share another glance, as if they understand. But how could they? How could  _anyone_  understand how he feels right now? The only person who might have any  _remote_  idea is nowhere to be found and now he's sitting in a diner with three strangers who are telling him that they  _pulled_ him out of Hell and...

Cooper's breath starts coming in heaving, sharp bursts and he can feel what he assumes is Sam's hand on his back and can hear his voice, soothing, trying to calm him down.

"Cooper," Sam says softly, "Hey man... You're alright."

"B-Blaine?" Cooper wheezes out, looking up at him.

Sam's eyes narrow in confusion for a second, "Your brother?"

Cooper nods frantically in response. He's sure he's attracted the attention of all of the staff, as well as the old couple in the diner.

"He's fine. He's alright."

"How... How do you know?" Cooper stutters.

At that, Sam looks up across the table at Cas, who nods. "Your brother is fine. Trust me," Sam says. And though Cooper has just met him, he tries. He tries to trust him.

...

"How do you know so much about all of this?" Cooper says between shoving fries in his mouth and  _god_  he never thought he'd miss shitty diner food so much. "About  _me_?"

Sam and Dean share a glance again. "It's kind of our family business," Dean says, clearing his throat.

"Family business?" Cooper says, raising his eyebrow.

Sam nods, "Our uh... Our dad hunted these kinds of things."

" _Demons_?"

"Demons, ghosts, among other things," Dean replies. And suddenly, the glances that Sam and Dean were sharing make complete sense to Cooper.

"You're brothers," He says, and from the look on Dean's face, that wasn't the reaction he was expecting. And maybe Cooper should have been worried about the  _among other things_  part, but things are finally starting to make sense now. "You're the  _Winchesters_ , aren't you?"

Dean's eyes widen, "How did you-"

"Anna said you could help me," He looks down, "But she uh... She never found you. Or at least not in time."

"She found us a couple of months back," Sam says, when Dean seems speechless in response.

"Why did you agree to help her?" Cooper asks, turning to look at Sam. "I mean, she's a demon. You hunt those things... Right?"

Sam smiles a little, "Yeah. Well... We _did_  almost kill her."

"But you didn't," Cooper says, though Sam can tell that he's looking for reassurance. Making sure that they didn't kill his friend.

"But we didn't," Sam confirms.

"Why?"

And, for the millionth time that night, Sam and Dean share another look. It lasts for a long moment, and when they finally break eye contact, Dean is the one to speak up. "Let's just say that Sam and I were in a very similar situation a few years back. A stranger helped us, so we figured we'd return the favor."

And suddenly, everything makes a little more sense. And Cooper looks between the two brothers, he feels more confident about Blaine being alright.

...

If Cooper wasn't horribly nervous already, his heart practically leaps out of his chest when the car turns down the street to his house. "I don't even know if he still lives here anymore," Cooper says, suddenly worried and doubting everything because it's  _too good to be true_. "What if he's not here?"

"He's still here," Castiel (as Cooper had learned was his  _actual_  name, not just  _Cas_ ) says, and though he hasn't spoken much and Cooper barely knows him, he feels this overwhelming calming feeling at his voice. He hopes he's right.

There's a car that he doesn't recognize out front and the lights are off in the house, but Castiel assures him  _again_  that Blaine still lives there and that he's alright, even if he's not home right now.

" _Thank you_ ," Cooper says quietly, staring at the house that he's been away from for almost a year now, "Really."

Dean just nods in response and Castiel is silent, so Sam speaks up. "Here," He says, pressing a folded up piece of paper into Cooper's hand, "Call us if you need  _anything_ , alright? We'll be here in a heartbeat."

Cooper nods, still trying to understand, "I will."

Dean clears his throat at that, "Good luck, Cooper."

And then he's grabbing his envelope and climbing out of the car. Instead of driving off, like Cooper had expected, Dean doesn't start the car. He just smiles reassuringly at Cooper, and at that, he takes his first step toward his home.

It hits him, once he's on the front porch, that he doesn't have a key and he panics for a split second before checking under the potted plant and finding the spare there, where Blaine  _always_  insisted on keeping it. Just in case.

And with one last look over his shoulder at the Impala across the street, Cooper unlocks the door, twists the knob, and opens it.


	9. If You're Broken I Will Mend You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Who are you?" Blaine demands, slamming him harder against the wood of the door. Cooper can't see his face. Of course he can't. He's been waiting a year in Hell to see that face again, and he can't even do that. Not yet. And suddenly it's all coming back to him - the fire and screams and the smell of burning flesh and the pain - and if it weren't for his brother (oh God his baby brother) holding him up, he'd collapse into a mess on the floor.
> 
> "It's me," Cooper manages to whimper out, "It's me, it's Cooper."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _And it's dark in a cold December, but I've got you to keep me warm  
>  If you're broken I will mend you and I'll keep you sheltered from the storm that's raging on now_

The house is dark when Cooper steps inside and shuts the door. Suddenly, he panics again, a million thoughts racing through his head. He should have called. He should have borrowed a phone while he was eating. He should have tried to contact Blaine before just  _showing up_. Cooper doesn't know if he's asleep. Doesn't know if he's away, and if so, how long he's going to be gone or where he even is. And if Blaine is there, asleep in their bed, what is Cooper supposed to do? Just walk in the room and expect Blaine, half asleep, to understand. Unless, of course, he was part of Anna's plan. Though if Cooper knows Anna, he wasn't.

Those thoughts race through his mind in a matter of seconds but he doesn't have much time to think about it before there's a loud noise and something is spilling over his head -  _was there seriously a bucket of water over the door?_  - and then someone (or something) is slamming him up against the front door, hard enough for him to hit his head. His eyes close tight in pain and  _the Winchesters are still out there, right? Maybe if you yell loud enough they'll hear you or_ -

"Give me one good reason not to kill you  _right fucking now_ ," A familiar voice whispers harshly to Cooper. There's an arm pressing against his throat along with a sharp press of what feels like a knife against his skin as well. He swallows hard, trying not to shake or break down or  _whatever_  because he knows that voice. He's  _missed_ that voice.

The last time he heard that voice, it was screaming his name in agony and-

And suddenly, though it seemed like a quick nap when he first woke up, the past year feels like it was the longest year of his life. Or lack there of.

"Blaine?" He whimpers quietly.

" _Who are you_?" Blaine demands, slamming him harder against the wood of the door. Cooper can't see his face. Of course he can't. He's been waiting a  _year_  in  _Hell_ to see that face again, and he can't even do that. Not yet. And suddenly it's all coming back to him - the fire and screams and the smell of burning flesh and the  _pain_  - and if it weren't for his brother ( _oh God his baby brother_ ) holding him up, he'd collapse into a mess on the floor.

"It's me," Cooper manages to whimper out, "It's me, it's Cooper."

" _Don't_ ," Blaine growls, pressing harder and now it's getting hard for Cooper to breathe with the way his arm and the knife are pressing into his neck, "Don't you fucking dare."

"B-" Cooper manages out before he's wheezing for breath.

" _What are you_?!" Blaine repeats, louder now, "Who sent you? How'd you - Why do you  _look like that_?"

Cooper's hands are scrambling, scratching on Blaine's arm - and God he still can't see his face all he wants is to see his face - and he gasps for air, the faint thought of  _I swear to God, Blaine, don't kill me before I've had a chance to see you_  flashes through his head before he's managing, "B,  _please_."

Apparently, that does something to Blaine, because then he's releasing his grip, allowing Cooper to slump to the floor against the door, and Cooper can see his shadowed figure taking a few steps backward. He takes a moment to catch his breath, hands at his throat (and  _wow_  he's bleeding), before he hears a  _click_  and  _is that a gun in his face_?  _When the fuck did Blaine get a gun_?

"You better start talking, or I swear to God," Blaine's voice wavers, "What are you? A demon? A shape shifter?"

Cooper would answer. He  _would_  say something,  _anything_ , but his eyes have adjusted and he can make out some of Blaine's features now and he can't  _speak_. His hair is disheveled and curly - either he was just in bed or he's gotten lazy with his hair - and he's wearing a baggy, what looks to be a striped, long sleeve shirt. Cooper recognizes it faintly as one of his own and his chest tightens at that. And he'd speak, he really would, if it weren't for the fact that he's been waiting a year in  _Hell -_  which he's starting to remember bits and pieces of - to see that face again.

" _Tell me!_ " Blaine finally screams, and  _yeah_  that's definitely a gun pointing in Cooper's face.

Cooper raises his hands. " _It's me_ ," His voice is rough and scratchy and it hurts to talk and his head is a jumbled mess of  _Blaine_ and  _demons_  and  _Hell_ , but he manages to speak. "It's me, Blaine, it is. P-please believe me."

Blaine takes a step back, gun still raised. He shakes his head, "No."

"Yes," Cooper breaths out, struggling to sit up straight against the door. He glances down at the floor, the puddle of water pooling around him and the circle and lines, which seem to be  _drawn_ on the floor with sharpie. He recognizes the shapes and markings as a Devil's trap that Anna had shown them how to make. It's supposed to keep demons out. He then looks back up at Blaine - eyes having adjusted more - and studies his face. Though it's still shadowed a little, he can make out the hard line his eyebrows make, as well as the crease in his forehead and his narrowed eyes and quivering lip. He wants to believe him, Cooper can tell, but he understands why he doesn't.

"Blaine," He tries again, voice still soft. The gun pointed at his face should make him more nervous than it does. "I'm guessing that was holy water," He says, looking down at the ground, "and the door is still lined with salt?" When Blaine doesn't say anything, Cooper takes a deep breath, "If I could move without you shooting me, I'd show you that I can leave this circle..."

Blaine's gaze is still hard, but Cooper takes the slight lowering of his weapon as his cue to go on, so he scoots over, until he's just outside the thick black line. " _Please_ ," Cooper resorts to begging again, almost on the verge of tears now because Blaine's face looks so hard, so worn, "It's me.  _It's really me, B._ "

It takes three whole seconds before Blaine is letting the gun fall to the floor and dropping to his knees in front of Cooper, wrapping his arms around him without so much as a second thought.

" _Thank God_ ," Cooper breaths, hugging him back. And he's touching Blaine.  _He's really touching Blaine._ This is real. He's really alive, and Blaine is here, in his arms, body shaking with deep, shuddering breaths. "I'm glad I didn't come all this way for you to shoot me," Cooper mumbles out, trying to smile a little against the soft cotton of his shirt on Blaine's skin.

" _It's really you,_ " Blaine finally breaths, his face still pressed into Cooper's shoulder.

Cooper nods against him, "It's really me."

And then Blaine is crying. His whole body is rocking in heaving breaths and sobs, and Cooper is holding onto him tight, eyes closed. As Blaine cries against him, Cooper tries not to think about how hard the past year must have been for him. He tries not to think about everything that Blaine must have gone through to bring him to this point - to putting a bucket of holy water and a Devil's trap at the front door. He tries not to think about the mess that he left his baby brother to clean up, but it's useless. And then Cooper is crying, too. Quiet, silent tears, but he's crying.

Blaine pulls away for a split second to look at Cooper's face - as if he's making sure that he's real, that he's not going to disappear like a dream - and then he's leaning forward and kissing him. He's still crying and the kiss is wet and desperate and Cooper can't imagine that he smells or tastes all that great, but Blaine is kissing him like his life depends on it and he can't bring himself to care.

Cooper isn't sure how long they're on the floor like that until Blaine speaks again. "How?"

Cooper lifts his head off Blaine's shoulder to look at him, "What?"

"How? How is this possible?" Blaine asks, suddenly worried, "How are you here?"

Cooper looks down. He's sure that the answer lies in the envelope in his pocket, but he'll worry about that later. Right now, he's looking at  _Blaine_  and that's a sight he never thought he'd see again and he can't take his eyes off of him. "I don't know," He says quietly, "But I'm here."

"How do I know this isn't a dream?" Blaine asks suddenly, panicking. He backs away, as if Cooper is going to hurt him, and Cooper reaches forward to grab his hand, to keep some form of contact. "How do I know you're not just going to disappear?" And Cooper finds himself wondering how many times that  _has_  happened to Blaine. How many times he's dreamed of him, only to wake to an empty bed. His heart aches.

"I'm real," Cooper says softly, scooting close to Blaine again, "I'm here, and I'm real, and I'm not going anywhere. Not again."

"I  _buried_  you, Cooper," Blaine says, voice pained, "How is this possible?"

And  _that_  hurts Cooper more than anything. He shouldn't have left this mess behind for Blaine to clean up. "I uh... I think Anna had something to do with it," He says softly. He manages to pull the envelope out of his pocket, "She sent her friends - those brothers - to come get me, and they gave me this. I haven't read it yet, but-"

Cooper is cut off by Blaine surging forward to kiss him again. "You're really here," He mutters in between kisses, "You're really here."

"I'm really here," Cooper replies, as if he can't believe it either.

Blaine pulls away after a moment, his hands on Cooper's wet clothes. He looks him up and down, brows furrowed. "It's been  _a year_ , though," He says cautiously, "How did you... Where were you?"

"Honestly?" Cooper asks, throat tight.

Blaine nods.

"I came-to halfway out of a grave."

Blaine stares at him wide-eyed for a long moment and Cooper is  _sure_  that there are a million questions running through his head (most importantly,  _how is your body the same_?) but he doesn't say anything. Instead, he just clears his throat, "You need a shower."

Cooper chokes out a dry little laugh, "The last thing I need is a shower right now. I need to see  _you_."

"And you  _can_  see me," Blaine says, nodding, "I'm not going anywhere. But you're soaking wet and covered in dirt and you need a shower and clean clothes."

Cooper looks down at himself - he  _does_  have a thin layer of dirt still covering his body and his clothes are soaked all the way through, there's even dirt under his nails - and he nods. "Fine."

Blaine helps him to his feet and lets Cooper wrap an arm around his shoulders before leading the way through the dark house toward the bedroom and adjoining bathroom. Once the door is shut behind them and the light is on, Blaine goes to work removing Cooper's shirt, pulling the clinging material over his head and tossing it to the floor. He swallows hard, taking in the sight, which causes Cooper to crack a small little smile until he looks down at himself. He quickly realizes that Blaine isn't staring because he's shirtless, (as he, still cocky as ever, had thought) it's because there's four, long thin lines - scars - that travel down his chest to his stomach, fading out around his navel. Claw marks. Cooper swallows hard, too.

He reaches forward, grabbing Blaine's hands. "I'm alright," He assures. And Blaine nods at that, hands reaching forward to Cooper's chest, and then his fingers are tracing lightly down the lines.

"Does it hurt?" He whispers, still staring at Cooper's scarred body.

He shakes his head, "Not anymore."

And then Blaine is smiling, even if it's just a little, and standing on his toes to kiss Cooper again before letting his hands make their way to the fly of his jeans.

Once Cooper is naked, Blaine turns the water on, and he goes to leave the bathroom until Cooper speaks again. "Stay," He says softly, watching his brother, "Please?"

And Blaine can't refuse. Of course he can't refuse. So he lets Cooper strip him down quickly, too. And he lets Cooper take his hand and pull him into the shower and under the hot water as well. "You're so beautiful," Cooper murmurs once they're under the stream of water. Blaine doesn't say anything in response, just grabs the shampoo and lathers up his hands before reaching up to run his fingers through Cooper's thick hair.

They're under the water, Blaine carefully washing Cooper clean, until it goes cold. And once it does, Blaine is offering a towel to his brother before grabbing one for himself and disappearing momentarily to get some clothes.

"Are you tired?" Blaine asks after Cooper is mostly dry and dressed, t-shit now covering his scarred torso.

"No," Cooper lies. In fact, he's exhausted, but he's scared that if he closes his eyes, Blaine will be gone, and this will all just be a dream.

Blaine nods, though Cooper is sure that he can see right through the lie. "Well... You wanna take a look at Anna's note?"

Cooper's hands are shaking as he opens the envelope. As much as he doesn't want to think about it - as much as he just wants to  _be_  with Blaine - he knows that for some reason, he's alive when he's not supposed to be, and the letter probably holds the answers as to why.

He clears his throat, eyes skimming over the page before he begins to read aloud.

" _Cooper,_

_If you're reading this letter, it means that you're alive. And that Sam and Dean weren't complete idiots and managed to find you. And that I did my job._

_You probably have a million questions, and I'll try to answer as many of them as I can. But if I can't, I'm sure the boys gave you their number. Don't hesitate to call them. They've been through shit like this before. They can help you._

_If you're reading this, Cooper, it means that I'm probably-"_

Cooper's voice catches in his throat.

"- _I'm probably dead. Now don't go beating yourself up over it. I know very well what I'm doing, and if I have to die for you to live, I'm more than happy to make that sacrifice. You deserve a second chance way more than I ever did, anyway._

_Sam and Dean say there's a way for us to close the gates to Hell. That means that all demons go back, or die. And their buddy Castiel, I'm sure they didn't tell you, but he's the one who's going to pull you out before this all goes down, if all goes according to plan."_

Cooper wipes a tear away before continuing.

_"I don't know what's going to happen to me, but that's okay. You deserve a long, happy life with Blaine. You deserve a second chance. Maybe I'll see you boys again one day. But if I don't, please just do this for me: Be happy. Don't waste your time with him. He loves you, more than you can imagine._

_Good luck, Cooper._

_-Anna"_

The letter is shaking in his hands once Cooper is done reading it, and Blaine's come up to steady him.

"She..." Cooper mutters, letting the letter fall to the floor, "She-"

"I know," Blaine says, voice soothing, "I know, Coop."

...

The brothers find themselves in bed not long after Cooper reads the letter, both physically and mentally exhausted. And Cooper can't even begin to explain how good it feels to lay down in his bed, next to his brother again.

"I'm sorry," Blaine says quietly after a long moment of silence. They're both laying there on their backs, staring at the ceiling.

"What?" Cooper asks quietly, turning to look at Blaine in the dim light.

"That it wasn't me," Blaine explains, "Who brought you back. I'm sorry it wasn't me." He swallows hard, turning to look up at the ceiling again, "I tried, Cooper. I tried everything. I tried making a deal, and every demon just laughed at me. I tried everything I knew, and I couldn't get you back. I'm sorry it wasn't me." He's crying now, breath coming out in shaky bursts, and Cooper immediately rolls over to wrap his arm around his waist.

"Stop," He says softly, "Stop that."

"I can't help it," Blaine says, shaking his head against the pillows, "It should have been me."

" _Stop_ ," Cooper repeats, "Don't say that. You  _tried_. And that's more than you should have done. I shouldn't have left you to clean up this mess. You had to  _bury_  me, Blaine. Jesus Christ. I shouldn't have left you to deal with this. So no. I'm the one who should be sorry."

"Do you remember it?" Blaine says suddenly, when it's quiet again.

"What?" Cooper asks softly. When Blaine doesn't say anything, he understands. He clears his throat. "A little," He answers honestly. "I didn't at first, but I remember bits and pieces now."

Blaine swallows hard, "Is it bad?"

And Cooper contemplates lying for a moment, but he decides against it. He can't lie to Blaine. He nods, pulling Blaine closer, "Yeah."

It's silent for a long moment before Blaine chokes out, "I'm sorry," again.

"Don't be," Cooper says softly, leaning up to press a kiss to Blaine's lips. "I've got you now. I'll be okay." And he's not sure if that's a lie or not. He's not sure how bad the memories from Hell are going to get. He's not sure if he  _will_  be okay, but he's got Blaine, and that's all that matters. Even if he wakes up in the middle of the night because of it, or if it's hard for him to believe that he's  _really_  back for a couple of months, he's got Blaine. And if he's got Blaine, he'll be okay.

"You've got me," Blaine echoes his thoughts, pulling him closer, "I'll take care of you."

"I love you," Cooper says suddenly, softly. He leans up so his face is over Blaine's and he smiles down at him, "I love you so much, Blaine. I'd do anything for you."

Blaine smiles, "You already have." And Cooper can't help but smile back at that before leaning down to kiss Blaine again. When they part, Blaine pulls him close, hugging him to his chest, murmuring out, "I've missed you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Seriously, thank you to everyone who read this. It took me forever to finish this fic, but it's one of my favorites.  
> Love you all :]

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't written Cooplaine in forever, but this fic is my baby. So be gentle.  
> There IS a little bit of SPN influences in this (obviously, with the crossroads demon and whatnot) and the last couple of chapters are a bit of a Supernatural crossover. This is cross-posted on ff.net.
> 
> The fic's title is inspired by "Lego House" by Ed Sheeran


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